From Hollywood, Kogabe Toothpoudre presents the Mel Blag show with Mary Jane Croft, Joe Kern, Jerry Hausner, Hans Conrad, Earl Ross, the sportsman, Victor Miller and his orchestra, and starring the creator of The Voice of Bugs Bunny. What's up, Dad? Yes, Kogabe Toothpoudre for a breath of sweet and teeth of sparkle brings you the Mel Blag show with Mel playing his new character, Zookie. Hello everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody, everybody. Hi. And starring himself in person, Mel Blag. Hi folks. Ugga ugga boo, ugga boo boo ugga. Zookie練 Bueka? Well, it's close to Thanksgiving, and in Nelblank's little town, courageous suitors are taking advantage of the holiday spirit to approach prospective fathers-in-law on a delicate subject. In one house, where Sam Green has asked Mr. Brown if he may marry his daughter, Mr. Brown is saying, Sam Green, I'm going to set the date next week. And in another house, where Henry Adams has asked Mr. Jones if he may marry his daughter, Mr. Jones is saying, Henry Adams, I'm going to make you a junior partner in my firm. And in the Colby house, where Nelblank has asked Mr. Colby if he may marry his daughter Betty, Mr. Colby is saying, Nelblank, I'm going to break every bone in your body. Now, it's Thanksgiving Eve, and in order to get in Mr. Colby's good graces again, Nelblank is holding a Thanksgiving party in his fix-it shop. He has invited a few of his friends for Thanksgiving dinner. Right now, we find Nel and his girl Betty setting the table. Knife, plate, fork, knife, plate, fork, knife, fork. Nel, those were the last two plates. Now what do you do? Oh, don't worry. Knife, piece of plate, fork, knife, piece of plate, fork. Gosh, what a beautiful table. Yes, there's the celery, stalks, stuffed olives, candied yams, cranberry sauce, all the fixings. And in the center, that great big beautiful 15 pound salami. But Nel, father will be awfully mad. He's expecting turkey. Oh, I took care of that. I scooped out the center of the salami and I stuffed it with chestnut dressing. And besides, Betty, what difference does it make, salami or turkey? It's the spirit of Thanksgiving that counts. But Nel. Anyway, the orphan's home needed the turkey much more than I did. Oh, darling, I love you for giving the turkey to the orphan's home. You always were a softy for children. Well, Betty, you know how I feel about us. One day we'll get married and we'll have a little two room house. Yeah, then after a while we'll add another room. Betty, I refuse to have your father live with us. Darling, I mean children. After we get married, there's no reason why we can't have three, four, or five. Yeah, and if we like them, then next year we'll have some more. Well, if Dad gets mad at you for not having turkey, I'm going to tell him why. Oh, that's another thing, Betty. I don't want you to tell your father anything. Don't tell anybody. I did it. I'm glad I did it, but I don't have to advertise it. Oh, that's the nicest thing I ever knew, darling. But that I'm going to give you a great big kiss. Well, Nel, say something. Such a kiss for a 15 pound turkey. Yes. Gosh, I wish it had been 50 pounds. Well, if it isn't our lodge secretary, Earl Ross. Hey, how you feeling, Brother Ross? Ah, potato salad. Oh, yeah, Betty made it. Say, why don't you try some? Well, just a small plate. I don't want to spoil my appetite. Mmm, delicious. Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Oh,orangia. robbed a but who's counting? Go on, have another one. Oh, here comes Father Mel. Hey, who's that fellow with him? Oh, that's Willie Murdock. Father just hired him to manage the supermarket. He's rather nice. Rather nice? Betty, have you gone out with him? Well, Father insisted that I go to the movies with him last night. You and Willie at the movies? Dark places? Betty, why didn't you tell me? Well, darling, it's Thanksgiving, and I didn't want to upset you. Now, you be nice to him. Huh. Oh. Hello, Mel. Oh. Happy Thanksgiving. Oh, happy Thanksgiving, Mr. Colby. Oh, Mel, I want you to meet my new manager, Willie Murdock. Hello, Mr. Murdock. Hello, boy. Heard a lot about you from Mr. Colby. Ha ha ha. Don't let it get you down. Willie, this is Mr. Ross, Secretary of our loyal order of benevolent zebras. Mr. Ross is a very good friend of mine. Oh, well, Mr. Colby, any good friend of yours is a good friend of mine. Pleased to meet you, Mr. Ross. Nice to must be. Ha ha ha. I'm very happy to meet you. Ha ha ha. I'm very happy to meet you. Hey, uh, you know, this is a very nice fix-it shop you got here, Blank, but I've got a couple of ideas to improve it. First of all, it's too stuffy in here. Well, it could use a little air conditioning. Blank, you can't condition this air. You got to get rid of it. Ha ha ha. And next, you take down that picture of the city dump on the wall. Murdock, that's no picture. You're looking through the window. Oh, well, oh, I see Miss Colby is unattached. Better go over and attach myself. Get it? Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Thanksgiving. Why couldn't the Pilgrim Fathers have landed on him? Oh, it's Zucca. Hello, Zucca. Happy Thanksgiving. Oh, hey, hello, everybody. Happy Thanksgiving. Ha ha ha. Merry Christmas. Ha ha ha. Hello, Zucca. Oh, hello. Betty. Thanks. Say, how do you like my new dress, Zucca? Ooh. Ha ha ha. Oh, gosh, Betty, you're the most beautiful... You're the quintessence of lovely... You're the... You're the... Ha ha ha. Whistle. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Oh, by the way, Zucca, I got a letter from my cousin, Dottie, and a new picture of her. Here, look. Ha ha ha. Cousin Dottie is so shy and sweet and coy. What do you think of her bathing suit? Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Zucca, can I get the little something before dinner? What would you like? I'd like some... I'd like some... Some candy, dear. You get... I'd like that picture of Dottie. Ha ha ha. Say, Betty, did you know that Mel invited us here for Thanksgiving dinner and there's no turkey? You're right, Mr. Colby. Mel invited us for Thanksgiving dinner and there's no turkey. Why, Thanksgiving isn't Thanksgiving without turkey. That's exactly my thought, Mr. Colby. Thanksgiving isn't Thanksgiving without turkey. This guy can easily be replaced with a sheet of carbon paper. I'm telling you, Mrs. Preposterous. Zucca, where's Mel? He went back to the kitchen. Oh. Well, I want to talk to him. And Murdock, Willie, you take care of Betty. Oh, well, if you say so, Mr. Colby. Anything you say goes, Mr. Colby. I'm your boy, Mr. Colby. You know you can count on me, Mr. Colby. Ha ha ha. Mel is in a jam again. I got to go and explain to her. I got to go and warn her. I got to go and tip her me oi. Ha ha ha. I got to go. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Use cold gate to powder. Keep piling just right. Use it each morning and use it each night. Don't take a chance with your romance. Use cold gate tooth to powder. No dates for you this festive season. Could a breath of trouble be the reason? Maybe because that breath of trouble, I mean, unpleasing breath, has brought unhappiness to thousands. Don't let it mark you down. Just do this. Brush your teeth night and morning and before every date with cold gate tooth powder. For cold gate tooth powder cleans your breath and it will help you to get rid of your bad breath. For cold gate tooth powder cleans your breath as it cleans your teeth. Yes, scientific tests have definitely proved that in seven cases out of ten, cold gate tooth powder instantly stops unpleasing breath that originates in the mouth. What's more, no dentifrice at any price cleans your teeth more quickly and thoroughly than cold gate tooth powder. Remember to buy it first thing and remember the name cold gate tooth powder with the accent on powder. Don't take a chance with your romance. Use cold gate tooth powder. Now, Victor Miller, the sportsman and their holiday arrangement of Good Night, Lady. Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night, lady! Good night ladies, good night ladies, good night ladies, we're gonna leave you now. Manly we roll along, roll along, roll along, manly we roll along, more to be seen, more to be seen. Farewell ladies. Goodbye. Goodbye. Good night. Toodle-oo. Farewell ladies. Goodbye. Goodbye. Good night. Toodle-oo. Farewell ladies, for we're gonna leave you now. Manly, manly we roll along, manly, manly we roll along, manly, manly we roll along, more to be seen. Manly we roll along, roll along, roll along, manly we roll along, more to be seen, more to be seen. Merrily we roll along, roll along, roll along, merrily we roll along, Lord, the D.C. blues beat. Well, Mel Blanc is giving a Thanksgiving party in his fix-it shop to get in the good graces of his girl's father, Mr. Colby, but so far everything is going wrong. Mr. Colby is mad because there's no turkey. Willie Murdock, the new supermarket manager, is making a play for Mel's girl. Right now the party is in full swing, but we find Mel disconsolately talking to Betty's kid brother Tommy in the corner of the shop. Boy, is my dad so rich, you, Mel. Yeah, Tommy, and I gave this party just to make an impression on him. What can I do to please your father? Mel, I know something you can do that'll surely please him. You do? What is it? No, you're too young to die. Well, anyway, my pop is mad at you for having salami instead of a turkey at this party. Yeah, I know. Mel, why don't you tell my potty gave the turkey to the orphans' home? Now, you keep out of this, Tommy. The reason I'm not saying anything is because this year your father forgot to give them a turkey himself. And if I said anything about it, it would only embarrass him. Oh. Oh, Mel, here comes our large President, Mr. Cushing. Good. I'll go over and welcome him. Holiday greetings, Brother Blank. Oogah-gah-boo, oogah-boo-boo-ogah. Greetings, mighty potentate. Oogah-gah-boo, oogah-boo-boo-ogah. How are things? Wonderful. Happiest Thanksgiving I ever had. Where's the wife? Home in bed with laryngitis. Happiest Thanksgiving I ever had. Yes, too bad. How's she feeling? Darn that penicillin. Say, how did she get laryngitis? Well, Mel, we went to the UCLA USC football game. Little woman went completely berserk, kept screaming her head off. She did? Yeah. Well, the first opportunity she ever had to yell at 22 men all at once. You mean now she can't talk at all? Not a word. She just lies there in bed and hisses. Empty the garbage pail, shake out the carpet sweeper, clean up the kitchen. I wish she wouldn't tell me what to do. I have my own system for doing the housework. Gosh, Mr. Cushing, it must be tough living with your wife. Mel, if you only knew. Last night we went out and she said, look at me, John, I'm dressed up to kill. Dad, what a temptation. I'll tell you, Mel, I'd leave that woman in a minute if she didn't have all that money. I don't know why I'm standing here telling you all this. It's just what I've done now, I'm a doctor. Oh, cheer up, Mr. Cushing. When you get your wife a Christmas present, everything will be okay. Well, she's already hinted about a present, she wants some beauty aid. Ha! No, no, Mr. Cushing, after all beauty is only skin deep. Mel, she's already been peeled. The nerve of that woman. She asked me for a beauty makeup kit. Well, what are you going to get her? With her face? A box of Dr. Scholl's foot pads. Nothing will help that woman, Mel. Well, I have to let you in for another disappointment, mighty potentate. I haven't any turkey. What a relief. You're happy not to see a turkey? Mel, are you forgetting I've been looking at my wife all day? Well, on to the party. Oh, I see Brother Colby here. Greetings, Brother Colby. Og, og, og, boo, og, boo, boo, og, og. Oh, greetings, mighty potentate. Og, og, og, boo, og, boo, og, og. And there's Brother Ross. Greetings, Brother Ross. Og, og, og, boo, og, boo, og, og. Oh, greetings, mighty potentate. Og, og, og, boo, og, boo, og, og. And there's Little Tommy. Og, og, og, boo, og. All right, Mr. Cooke, all right. Well, I'm sorry. I thought I'd run away with my caboose. All right, come on, everybody. Let's all have fun. Does anybody want to hear me impersonate Charles Boyer? All right, I'll sing a song. Anybody hear the story about the cop in Brooklyn? Shall I sing now? Oh, yes, yes, yes. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. I'll sing a song. You've never heard this story before. Is it about the cop finding the dead horse on Cosciusco Avenue? Uh-huh. And he can't say Cosciusco so he moves the horse to Main Street? Uh-huh. Shall I sing now? No! I'll tell another one and I know you don't know this story. A fellow was having soup in a restaurant and he called over the head waiter. See here sir, he exclaimed, there's a fly in the soup. What do you think the head waiter said? Did he say what do you want for a diamond elephant? Yes, and I wish you'd drop dead. I'll try one more story now. Alright, everybody quiet now. Mr. Colby's going to try one more story. Go ahead Mr. Colby, everybody keep quiet. Thanks, Myron. Thanks. Well, it seems a man in a restaurant called the waitress over and said, my cocoa is cold. Well, replied the waitress, if your cocoa is cold, put your hat on it. Oh, very funny, very, very funny. Shall I sing now Mr. Colby? I've had enough from you Mel Blank. You ruined my entire evening. His entire evening? Father, let's all... And you've got a nerve inviting people to a Thanksgiving party and not even having any turkey. Not having any turkey. But father... Hey, when do we eat? I'm starved. That's a good idea. Come on father, let's eat. Oh, alright. Okay everybody, sit down now. This food looks wonderful. No home cooking. Well, everybody see that? Yeah, let's go. Okay. I'll carve the salami. Who wants a leg? I do. I do. I do. Everybody wants a leg? I should have gotten an octopus. I'd rather have turkey. Colby, will you stop? Everyone knows salami is much safer than turkey. Safer? Yeah, it's no bone. Well Tommy, what part do you want? I want the part that goes over the counter laugh. And how about you brother Ross? Well, I don't know. Then we'll do the aftertaste. Just give me the dark meat. The salami is all dark meat. That's what I said, just give me the dark meat. Oh Murdoch, what part do you want? I always like Mr. Colby choose first. Alright Mr. Colby, what part would you like? Oh, this has gone too far. I refuse to sit here and be made a fool. Oh, but Mr. Colby... Now this can't go on any longer. I'm going to tell father. Betty, please. Tell me why. Why we haven't any turkey tonight. Oh, come in. Is Mr. Blank here? I'm Al Blank little boy. Mr. Blank, I'm from the orphanage home. I brought you a piece of your turkey. You did? Yes, it tasted so good all the boys wanted you to have some. They wanted me to tell you how much they appreciated you remembering them on Thanksgiving Day. Gee, thanks. They also asked me to give a message from all the boys at the home. Do you mind if I give it? No, no, go ahead. Two, four, six, eight, who do we appreciate? Mal Blank, Mal Blank, hooray! Oh, thanks a lot. Go on Mr. Blank. Go on. Gee, wasn't that sweet. Mal, you gave your turkey to the orphanage. Oh, why didn't you tell us about it? Well, you're right again Mr. Colby. Mal Blank, why didn't you tell us? Oh, shut up! Well, Mal, he didn't want to tell you because you forgot to give your turkey this year. What? Why I always give a turkey to the orphanage. In fact, I told Willie Murdoch. Murdoch, didn't you deliver that turkey? Mr. Colby, it slipped my mind. Oh, it did, Murdoch, come here. I'm going to break every bone in your body. Quiet everybody, Mr. Colby's going to break every bone in his body. Gee, it sounds good on somebody else. Oh, forget it Mr. Colby, it's Thanksgiving, let's forgive. Yes, you're right Mel. Yeah, let's forgive and let's eat. All right, here, sit next to me Mel, my son. Thanks, Pop. Oh, nothing like the smell of salami on Thanksgiving. You see Betty, it's like I said, what difference does it make, salami or turkey? It's the spirit of Thanksgiving that counts. Music Mel Blanc will be back in just a minute. Music Use Colgate Toothpouter, keep smiling just bright. Use it each morning and use it each night. Don't take a chance with your romance. Use Colgate Toothpouter. You noticed it quickly enough in others, but you seldom suspected in yourself. That's the insidious thing about that breath of trouble, I mean, unpleasing breath. So ask yourself if you could be a victim. Then let Colgate Toothpouter help you. Brush your teeth night and morning and before every date with Colgate Toothpouter. For Colgate Toothpouter cleans your breath as it cleans your teeth. Yes, scientific tests have definitely proved that in seven cases out of ten, Colgate Toothpouter instantly stops unpleasing breath that originates in the mouth. What's more, no dentifers at any price cleans your teeth more quickly and thoroughly than Colgate Toothpouter. Remember to buy it first thing and remember the name, Colgate Toothpouter with the accent on powder. Don't take a chance with your romance. Use Colgate Toothpouter. This is Mel Blank saying happy Thanksgiving and that's all, folks. This is Bud Easton reminding you that Colgate Toothpouter for a breath of sweet and teeth that sparkle brings you The Mel Blank Show every Tuesday at this time. Be sure and join us again next Tuesday night for more fun with Mel and the people you'll meet in Mel Blank's Fix-It Shop. Say hello to Halo Shampoo for naturally bright and beautiful hair. Remember even finest soaps and soap shampoos hide the natural lustre of your hair with Dulling Soap Film. But Halo Shampoo contains no soap, therefore leaves no Dulling Soap Film. Even in hardest water, Halo makes oceans of rich, fragrant lather, quickly banishes loose dandruff and dirt. Halo needs no lemon or vinegar rinse. Say hello to Halo and goodbye to Dulling Soap Film. Get Halo Shampoo at any cosmetic counter. The Mel Blank Show is written by Mack Benoff. This is CBS, the Cloudy Broadcasting Service.
