From Hollywood, Colgate Toothpoudre for A Breath That's Sweet and Teeth That Sparkle presents the Mel Blank Show! Hello, Mrs. Burns. Here's your mail. Well, goodbye, Mrs. Burns. Remember, keep smiling. You've heard him as the famous train caller. Free living on track five for an iron, Azusa and Coop Gamonga. You've heard him as the lovable character, Zookie. Well, in the fixer shop, I'm the president of the, uh, president of the, uh, I'm the vice president of the, uh, I'm the vice president of the, uh, I'm the treasury of the, uh, I sweep out the place. You've heard him as the famous Warner Brothers cartoon character, Bubbs Bunny. Eh, what's up, guy? Now hear him as the star in his own show. Hello, Mel Blank's Fix It Shop. You bend it, we mend it. Now let's drop in at Mel Blank's Fix It Shop, where you're pretty sure to find things in an awful fix. Well, it seems that Mel's fiance, Betty, has been dropping none too subtle hints about the need for efficiency in the fix it shop. I wouldn't say that Uncle Rupert and Zookie are exactly moochers, but, well, they're more than just a little worried. Zookie, we have to show that we're efficient around here or else. So you'd better try working faster. Oh, I'm, I'm, I'm, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, quick, all right. See, I, I'm like a bolt of light in a, uh, I'm a regular dynama, uh, dynama, uh, uh. I think I blew a fuse. Zookie, here comes Mel. Quick, get busy. Okay. Hello, Mel. What kept you so long? Oh, that Adam's job was bigger than I expected. Her toaster wasn't the only thing Mrs. Adam's broke. She broke her lawnmower and she broke her electric iron. I hope you presented the lady with a substantial bill. bill I couldn't mrs. Adams was broke too oh I see uncle Rupert Betty's right as a businessman I'm a washout we need a little efficiency around here just look at this place it's a shambles oh I don't know it just has a sort of a lived-in feeling yeah lived in I'm serious just look at that cigar butt on the floor is that yours uncle no my lad you saw it first stop kidding why you are in a sour mood nephew look why don't you get yourself a ticket for the girly review at the gaiety tomorrow night it'll cheer you up now uncle have you seen the pictures of Fifi Devine the star why that gorgeous little lady has everything and she carries it so well uncle Rupert you know I wouldn't waste a breath on any other girl but Betty why Betty's the most honorable girl hello there sugar boy I'm Fifi Devine oh boy I thought you weren't going to waste a breath on her it wasn't wasted gosh I feel better already you've got a sign outside that says you can fix anything under the Sun I specialize in little jobs under the moon look pop get back to your funny papers I'll talk to your straight man here well what can I do for you miss well I'm the star of the pinup girl review opening at the gaiety theater tomorrow night you've been at the gaiety haven't you sugar boy oh sure I go there practically every night why Melvin it's the only place in town you can get Hershey bars you're cute look sugar boy you see this little gadget I want you to fix it for me sure it's just a little zipper oh it's not just a little zipper there's only one like it it was made especially for me in my harem dance harem dance mm-hmm that's the one Anna didn't do for the king of science why not did he have a weak heart you see in my dance the miracle zipper dropped off one veil when I go like this another one when I go like this and another one when I go like this look uncle no hands well make sure you have my miracle zipper ready by tomorrow goodbye sugar boy mr. Vine it just happens I'm going your way which way are you going gee hello sugar boy hello oh hello Betty well you see there was something wrong with her zipper so naturally she thought of me huh I didn't see you come in obviously oh that was Fifi Devine the glamorous dancer at the Gaiety glamorous I can't say she wears clothes very well wearing clothes isn't her specialty nevermind I have something more important to talk to you about Mel I know Betty efficiency I finally found a man who will tell you how to run your business what to buy what to sell and how much to charge she must be from Washington well he's an efficiency expert just came to town Herbert good you now are you or are you not gonna let me get a hold of him for you well okay honey when will you get in touch with them the day before yesterday oh the day before huh yes I wanted to make sure you wouldn't change your mind mr. Blank I'm Herbert good you with the efficiency expert how do you feel well I had a little cold care huh that's your first lesson in efficiency blank I've just known you a few minutes how could I possibly care how you feel but you ask always get to the point that's the good you speedy-dee-dee way speedy-dee-dee now listen mr. blank I'll give you an example of what real efficiency can do for people for instance when mrs. good you and I converse we use my famous peachy speechy system peachy speechy not a word wasted for instance if I want to compliment mrs. good you on a delicious dinner I do not say darling the flounder was so delicious it simply melted in my mouth you don't know indeed II that wouldn't be speedy-dee-dee I leave out all the unimportant words and say darling flounder mouth well I guess you can't get away with that as long as you say darling what's that you're fooling with oh I have to see about miss Fifi zipper what you do outside of business hours is no concern of the good you efficiency program mr. good you I don't think you understand I see I'll have to change your whole business approach first of all how do you say no to your customers I just open my mouth and it rolls out when you say no you've got to make people realize you mean it oh I have proved that dogs and guinea pigs that when you shake your finger in their faces and say no spelling it out no they react fast well what about the dogs and guinea pigs that can't spell number two another feature of my speedy-dee-dee plan yeah look at this mad jumble here in your shop when I'm through every time you turn around you'll fall over just what you're looking for it never fails do you sell accident insurance too and number three that's the hearty-departing way of saying goodbye gosh I better write all these things down it's a goodbye with just a touch of hello in it like this gosh that may sound like you're glad to see them go oh you're a lucky man mr. blank when I'm through when you're fixing shop today you'll be masters speedy-dee-dee pitchy-pitchy and hearty-departed okie-dokie I mean okay I'll do it for Betty oh that's the old speedy-dee-dee I'll do it even if it drives me slappy happy you want me to fix this base mrs. Otis yes if you please Melvin oh you should see my little grandchild poor little fellow he's teething my daughter just has to keep burping him all the time who cares huh what was that speedy-dee-dee speedy-dee-dee-dee no blank you're much too old for baby talk about your face the answer is no no in old no I I don't understand you funny dogs and guinea pigs understand take your finger out of my face I think you've gone mad give me back my face okay where is it you see another feature of the speedy-dee-dee plane you can't turn around without falling over just what you're looking for it never fails I'm getting out of here but you're going to pay for that ball and I'm going to tell everybody to stay away from this door oh mrs. Otis I almost forgot hearty the party goodbye gosh uncle Rupert mr. Goodhue's efficiency plan is ruining me I lost three good customers already today or don't forget mrs. Long necker my beloved Clara the richest woman in town did she walk out to not before she slapped my face but why I decided to try mr. Goodhue's peachy speechy system to propose you know leave out all the unimportant words well I was I eloquent I suggested I come and live with her and her mansion spend all our days together perhaps have a few little ones well those are certainly honorable intentions I meant them to be but one of the unimportant little words I left out of my proposal was marriage what's gonna happen next I fixed miss Fifi zipper but I can't find it anywhere what all this darn efficiency stuff oh I'll ruin her career she'll drag me into court she'll sue me for every dollar I've got I just hope mr. Goodhue was satisfied now Melvin he in a speedy deedy peachy speechy hearty the party he just left out the most important thing that's all what's that nephew Harry Carrie you cold gate to powder keep smiling just right use it each morning and use it each night don't take a chance with your romance use cold gate to powder how often it happens you meet a man you think he's a nice fellow but but what well you hate to say it but it's that little breath of trouble I mean unpleasing breath the chances are this chap doesn't dream that a breath of trouble is tagging making him unpopular hindering him in business spoiling his fun without suspecting it you may be the victim of unpleasing breath so be on your guard against it just do this brush your teeth night and morning and before every date with Colgate tooth powder for Colgate tooth powder cleans your breath as it cleans your teeth yes scientific tests have definitely proved that in seven cases out of ten Colgate tooth powder instantly stops unpleasing breath that originates in the mouth what's more no dentifrice at any price cleans your teeth more quickly and thoroughly than Colgate tooth powder remember to buy it first thing and remember the name Colgate tooth powder with the accent on powder don't take a chance with you use Colgate well let's drop back again at Mel blanks fix-it shop where the new efficiency plan of speedy deedy peachy speechy and hearty to party has the morale very low indeed II weedy so if he sees who's Mel and he loses the shop we'll be out on the street frankly I'm worried oh yes yes so am I I'm a beside myself with it if I'm beside myself with I'm beside myself hey it's getting crowded in here there's only one chance Mel is out somewhere trying to find something like that zipper right now gosh I sure hope he finds it good Lord here comes Fifi now you talk to her Zippy me but don't tell her Mel lost that zipper don't let her pry it out of you I'm leaving for the back door don't worry I'll take care of her I know what it's the end tell her I know just what I'm gonna say hello sugar boy I'll say you're cute who are you I'm a Zuki I work for Mel where is your boss I came to pick up my pepper oh well and me Mel just stepped out for me me for me and me he'll be back in a couple of well I think he got lost well we don't need him Zuki Fifi just wants her zipper now tell tell me where Mel left it come on sugar boy no you can tell me anything we're here all alone aren't we that's in nice and cozy yeah but I can always call for help we're all alone and after all you're a man and I'm a woman well let's leave it that way oh I'm tired of this you tell that pinheaded boss of yours if I don't have that zipper for my show tonight I'll sue him for every dollar he's got but yeah but yeah but don't you but me do you know what that zipper is supposed to do for me tonight oh sure keep your shirt on oh darling I'm so sorry this whole efficiency business is my fault but I was just thinking of you oh it's not you Betty it's just that I'm not good enough for you now don't you dare talk like that well I know a couple of people who can't see why you want to marry me your mother your father your grandmother uncle Emmett cousin Oliver then there's a couple of others mr. Thayer the banker mr. Cooney the traffic cop mr. albernathy the taxidermist my old Scoutmaster my landlady the 4-h club the American Legion the Shriners the UNO but I do love you I love you too Betty I'll get out of this somehow I'll just keep a stiff lower lip now the expression is a foolish well can I help it if it's my lower lip that's trembling you'll be here any minute uncle Rupert I don't know what else I can do I just can't find her zipper well nephew don't worry if worst comes to worst I'll go out and get a job gosh I'd hate to see you spoil your record oh my gosh here comes dr. crab the veterinarian he would come at a time like this never mind the lad I'll take care of that canine kill dear oh thanks uncle I'll go and take one last desperate look around well hello Christopher how's the dog doctor this morning consulting veterinarian if you don't mind what's the matter with you nothing's a matter with me I'd catch in my throat could I have a pan of water please do you realize you're even getting to sound like a dog why thank you Rupert dog this man's best friend in fact I understand them you understand what dogs say why certainly I have a little Pekingese when he looks up at me with his big watery eyes and says you know what that means he's hungry oh somebody must have told you what dogs are wonderful when my little Cocker spaniel goes over to meet my great Dane says then the big Dane says and then that little Cocker and what does that mean I don't know but they sure understand each other oh please go away yeah I must be going out but remember elephants need your sympathy especially adults they blow their nose and wait so long until they get results I know mr. I should be over at the theater right now but I can't go on what am I gonna dance in my girdle that ought to be snappy hey that's what I'll do I got it I got it have you gone crazy man you stay out of this mr. good you uncle Rupert throw those nuts and bolts where they belong yeah that's right right there in the sink and all this goes back where it was too everything just the way it was yesterday morning the same mess the same mess are you sure mr. good you I should know I should know oh that's great that's wonderful where you going to get this beefy zipper now that everything's in order again I know just where it is here you see it was inside mrs. Zabrowski's ether you know see for zephyr and see for zephyr oh let me have that zipper I've got to run to the theater and to show you there's no hard feelings I'll bring my car around for you to think well what's wrong with your car huh you know me sugar boy I strip the gears something else I can do for you mr. blank mr. good you the answer is no no and oh that spells no goodbye mr. good you you know hearty to party goodbye we'll be back in a minute for a zuckeyism what you never heard of a zuckeyism well hang around use Colgate to powder keep smiling just right use it each morning and use it each night don't take a chance with you man use Colgate look let's face the facts a little breath of trouble I mean unpleasing breath is no respecter of persons girl or woman man or boy teamster or tycoon debutante or Duchess all are possible victims of unpleasing breath why even you though you don't suspect it may risk your happiness ruin your romance even jeopardize your job because of unpleasing breath so isn't it best to be on your guard to watch out for that little breath of trouble my advice is do this brush your teeth night and morning and before every date with Colgate tooth powder or Colgate tooth powder cleans your breath as it cleans your teeth yes scientific tests have definitely proved that in seven cases out of ten Colgate tooth powder instantly stops unpleasing breath that originates in the mouth what's more no dentifers at any price cleans your teeth more quickly and thoroughly than Colgate tooth powder remember to buy it first thing remember the name Colgate tooth powder with the accent on powder don't take a chance with you romance use Colgate tooth powder well Zucchi we've had a lot of excitement but I hope you learned something about efficiency yes Zucchi to be efficient you should score yourself on things like ingenuity perseverance industry how would you score yourself well on ingenuity ingenuity I score for five yeah on perseverance I score it on industry I scored it I don't know what the score is this is Bob Easton reminding you that Colgate tooth powder for a breath of sweet and teeth of sparkle brings you the Mel blank show every Tuesday at the same time be sure to join us again next Tuesday night for more fun with Mel and the people you'll meet in Mel blanks fix-it shop say hello to halo shampoo for naturally bright and beautiful hair remember even finest soaps and soap shampoos hide the natural lustre of your hair with dulling soap film but halo shampoo contains no soap therefore leaves no dulling soap film even in hardest water halo makes oceans of rich fragrant leather quickly banishes loose dandruff and dirt halo needs no lemon or vinegar rinse say hello to halo and goodbye to dulling soap film get halo shampoo at any cosmetic counter Mel blank show is written by David Victor and Herb Little jr. was produced by Joe Reis say hello to halo shampoo if you want naturally bright and beautiful hair for halo shampoo contains no soap therefore leaves no dulling soap film halo lets hair sparkle with natural brilliance even in hardest water halo makes oceans of rich fragrant leather to quickly carry away loose dandruff and dirt halo needs no lemon or vinegar rinse say hello to halo and goodbye to dulling soap film get halo shampoo at any cosmetic counter ladies help out by taking your used kitchen fat to your butcher you'll pay you four cents a pound selling McCann of fat this week for sure Financial
