Stay tuned for Nero Wolf, who follows Transcribed in 30 seconds. Later tonight over most of these NBC stations, Duffy's Tavern comes your way, and on the menu at Duffy's tonight, there's a blue plate special of grilled English language, served up by the delightfully ungrammatical Archie, plus laughs garnished with chuckles brought to you by Archie's remarkable crew. There's no cover charge at Duffy's Tavern, just keep your dial tuned to NBC. And this Sunday means another broadcast of the big show, and your guests include Fred Allen, Douglas Fairbanks, Danny Thomas, and many, many more. Tallulah, of course, is your hostess on the big show. Phone ringing Ladies and gentlemen, that phone bell means adventure. Hello? Hello. The young man answering the phone is Archie Goodwin. The mountain of a man engaged in deep thought in the oversized armchair is Nero Wolf. Mr. Wolf, we've got a case. I'm not sure whether somebody's going to kill a rabbit or a rabbit is going to kill somebody, but either way, it's going to be murder. Please, Mr. Wolf, even orchids have to eat. Oy. Yes, sir, Mr. Wolf will take the case. As a matter of fact, he's working on it right now. Money, work. Greatest detective in the world. Only trouble is, he is. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Archie is right. Nero Wolf is the greatest detective in the world. And the fattest, and the least energetic. Nero Wolf, created by Rex Stout, and brought to you over this NBC network and a new series of adventures by Mr. Sidney Greenstreet. Music Tonight, it's the case Nero Wolf likes to remember as the case of the friendly rabbit. He sometimes prefers his proverb scram. It began in lots of places. Let's take a look at a few of them. In particular, the richly appointed library of a man named Veek. Mr. Veek, what's happening? Relax, Haines, your blood pressure. I thought it was a gag, but you really are shutting the club down. I'm shutting it down. Why? I got the joint role and the suckers are pouring in. And next week, the governor's committee. Huh? It's moving out of Baylor County, our joint enterprise is in Baylor County. I think the club needs a rest. Crime committees so rarely admire gambling. Oh, that's different. So it is. The club needs a rest, you need a vacation. Florida perhaps? I don't like Florida. Pick any place you like, just so long as you get out of reach of a subpoena. They hate Santa, huh, boys? You've just coined a phrase that may very well catch on. Get out and stay out of the state until I send for you. Okay, Mr. Veek. Sure, Mr. Veek. Marshal? Yeah? That about covers us in Baylor, am I right? Yeah, right. The dear governor's dear committee will be sorely disappointed. However, I doubt it'll give up quite so soon. I wouldn't think so. Therefore, have the truck driver deliver another shipment of carrots to the rabbit farm. Eh, Marshal? Okay, boss. Come in, Williams. Good afternoon, Governor. Good afternoon. Williams, I'm disturbed. The crime committee, sir? It was doing well, very well, and then... I know, sir. There's a leak. Someone is passing on confidential information. Who? That's the problem. Who? Started three weeks ago. A three-man committee, Wilson, McCarthy, Tolliver. One of them, Williams? I'd stake my life, sir, no. Then who? You've forgotten Cardier, committee secretary. You have reason to suspect him? No, nothing that means anything. Except... You do suspect him? Well, he's been watched, telephone calls checked, mail. I have no reason to suspect him. Except that one thing bothers me. What's that? He has a small farm in Greendale County. He rarely went near the place and all the time he's been up here at the Capitol. But that's suddenly changed. Three weeks ago? Yes, sir. He's been staying at the farm for three weeks. Is there anything unusual about that farm? Nothing unusual. Except Jimmy Cardier has gone in for raising rabbits. Jimmy. Who is it? Oh, hello, Clara. You've been hiding from me. I've been out here with the rabbits. Jimmy, what's wrong? With what? You. There's nothing. You're lying. We grew up together, remember? We lived next to each other, Jimmy. We were going to be married. Hey, wait a minute. We still are, last I heard. You haven't heard recently enough. What does that mean? It means we're not getting married. But Clara... You've been avoiding me. And you've been getting money, lots of money from someplace. And in a shady way, I feel. All right, you know. So what? I've been concerned about your sudden devotion to these... these rabbits. And the kind of men you've been seeing. What do you mean? Like the one up at the house now, waiting for you. Oh, there's somebody waiting? That's why I came down here after you. I'd better get up there. He's a crook, Jimmy. Look, I... All right. I sort of got myself in a mess. I needed money, but it's over, Clara. No more. Are you sure? Of course I'm sure. I wish I could believe you. For your own sake. But I feel I can't. Not anymore. Ah, J. Yes, Mr. Wolfe. Either stop breathing so heavily or... Take the evening off? Stop breathing. Old Dr. Tidmouse wouldn't approve of that. Two in blue and assorted blazes is old Dr. Tidmouse. My family doctor. May have escaped your puny mind, but you don't have a family. Answer the phone. Oh, but it might be a case. It might be very important. It might mean work, Mr. Wolfe. Archie. W-O-R-K. You've got millions in the bank. Why worry? Confirmed, Jude. You want me to answer their phone myself? Now you've got me. No, Mr. Wolfe, couldn't let you knock yourself out lifting a telephone receiver. Nero Wolfe's office. Archie Goodwin speaking. What? W-W-Wait, Mr. Wolfe is to go up to Greendale at... Oh, now look, friend. Mr. Wolfe does not go anywhere and that includes Greendale. He wouldn't stir out of the house for anybody short of the... What? I see. Yes, sir, in an hour. Goodbye. Mr. Wolfe, brace yourself. You've got an appointment with a Mr. Williams at the Starlight Hotel in Greendale for one hour from now. You're insane. No, I'll admit I've been tempted. Furi, were it not for the fact that often the native view of resolution is sickled over with a pale cast of thought... Quoting Hamlet will get you no place. I would fire you. And then who would drive you to the Starlight Hotel in Greendale? I'm not going to Greendale. Nevertheless, in an hour you will be there. And who may I inquire, Cecil? The governor of the state. Is that all, Mr. Williams? That, Mr. Wolfe, is all anyone knows about the situation. Except the guilty man, of course. An admirably clear summary, Mr. Williams. Obviously our meeting here at the hotel was necessary. I couldn't be seen entering your house, nor would it have been advisable for you to visit the governor. I can appreciate that. You're quite sure I need pay no attention to anyone on the committee except James Collier? Quite sure. Police surveillance of Collier is deemed unwise. He has certainly taken interest in rabbits, but although keeping them may perhaps be considered suspicious, it is hardly in itself of value. You have no other evidence against Collier? I know we're clutching at straws, Mr. Wolfe, but there is a leak and work is being nullified. Something must be done. Hence the governor's call for you. Very well, sir. I shall attempt to be more than a man clutching at a straw. I said attempt. Ah, gee, unpack. We shall stay at Greendale near Collier and his rabbits. Mr. Wolfe? Mr. Wolfe? Oh, naturally I know that shutting your eyes and pushing your lips in and out indicates you're thinking feverishly, but there's nothing for you to think about. Furi. I accept your correction. What are you thinking about? Hotel beds. They're notoriously flimsy. Oh, you gave up on the case so soon. Fiddlesticks. I already know exactly what are all the rabbits playing at problem. Therefore... We're going to drive out to Collier's farm? You are. While you test the hotel beds, fine. It'll be necessary for you to spend the night at Collier's place. You drive out there and pretend you've lost a cylinder or something. Oh, a lost cylinder. Oh, fine. Confound you actually you can invent something plausible as a pretext, and if you are properly charming, Mr. Collier will, I hope, invite you to stay the night. And during the night I sleep, hmm? Happily breathing the fresh country air. Trust not. Okay, Mr. Wolfe, I accept the assignment. I will learn all I can from Mr. Collier's rabbits. Incidentally, remember the play Harvey? I do. Why? Harvey was an invisible rabbit, a figment of a man's imagination. I hope this rabbit venture is more tangible, Mr. Wolfe. It is, Mr. Goodwin. Will you desist in the pot? Okay, okay. Oh, if anyone calls, just say I've gone out to Greendale to cross-examine a rabbit. Ah, gee. I think you're going to be quite surprised. Yes. Hmm. Ha ha ha ha ha. Running out of gas, and me such a big boy. Hmm. Ah. Oh. Hello. Ah, hello. A tree a friend of yours? The, the tree? Yeah, the one you're clutching. Oh, I, I was leaning against it. It's an idea, but not a good one. Trees are notoriously skittish. The instant you really need one, they're out sowing wild oaks or something. You sound as if you know a lot about trees. Oh, I do. I was brought up in one. Look, now, if you really have to lean, I can recommend you. No, thanks. I tried. Nice moonlight we're having. My name is Goodwin, and blondes call me Archie. I'm not blonde. Brunettes call me Archie, too. And what do redheads call you? Oh, we'll just skip that. And your name is? Claire. Claire. I approve. Now, you may not believe this, but I have just run out of gas. You think I might wangle some up at your house? My house? You mean Jimmy's house. All right, I mean Jimmy's house. Well, I don't know. He might have some. Now, why don't we go up to the house and ask him? All right. Mm-hmm. Jimmy who? Collier. Uh-huh. I like to be formal when I'm borrowing gas. Would you mind waving your left hand in front of my nose? Waving, Mike? Yes, just try it. Don't worry. I won't bite it. All right. I did. And very gracefully, too. No ring on the third finger. You're not Mrs. Collier. There isn't any Mrs. Collier. Are you applying for the position? Mr. Goodwin, I... Now, remember what I confided in you about brunettes. All right. Archie, you're a little rapid. Maybe. But I always remember what old Dr. Tidmouse said. What did he say? Gather ye rose buds while ye may. Old time is still a-flying. Robert Herrick wrote that. He did? Dr. Tidmouse is a liar. How much farther is this house? Well, it's just beyond those trees. I... What? Oh, I... There was something that ran across the path. It brushed my legs. Frighten me so... Must have been a rabbit. I... I guess it was. Oh, I'm sorry. There was silly on me. Oh. Don't worry about it. Also, you will have noticed how much more satisfactory I am than a tree. We're clutching at it, moments of stress, I mean. Archie. But you'd better let go now. What I... And we'll get on to the house. See, I don't need a haircut and you're not the right type for Delilah anyway. You mean something by that. Something nasty. Well, that depends. What I meant is you've already signaled whoever you're supposed to signal. Nothing frightened you back there. Why? That scream had a lot of carrying power. Oh, that's the house, huh? Looks peaceful enough. Archie, I... Who were you supposed to warn if anyone came up the path to the house? Well, no one. Something did frighten me. Honey, I've been lied to by experts and you're not one. Oh. Think I ought to knock? No, we don't think I ought to knock. Dark inside. Except for a handful of moonlight filtering in through the windows. Kind of early for Carly to turn in, isn't it? I wouldn't know. Let's go find out. Now, relax, relax. Grandpa's making all the chimes. Time is... Yeah, 10 o'clock. It's getting late. Come on. This would be the living room. Filled with early American furniture. The early Americans would be pleased. Nothing here. What's that door lead to? I... I don't know. Oh, I won't tell. Smaller room. Darkest... Come in. Put the beer on... Oh, you're not the billboy. I'm sorry. I should have remembered to bring some beer. Indeed, and you are? I'm a fellow guest at this hotel, Mr. Wolf. My name is Vique. Vique, I... is a criminal of moderate intelligence and immoderate pretensions. We won't quarrel, Mr. Wolf. I have something to offer you. You and your boy Goodwood didn't drive up to Greendale for the exercise. I dislike exercise. Shortens life. James Collier lives nearby. The Governor's Committee on Crime is unhappy. There's been a leakage of information. It hasn't helped them in their work. But it has helped you. You wouldn't have left your house in New York on any ordinary job. A request from the Governor, however, but shall we stop fencing? I don't have to fence with you. The Committee's work doesn't particularly bother me. I've already made my arrangements for retiring from active business, shall I say. However, I don't want you messing around in the meantime. Indeed. In your effort to discover how the Committee's information leaked out, you might also discover a number of things about me that I prefer to remain undiscovered. No one has employed me to do anything about you, sir. Not directly, but indirectly you might have to. I want to insure myself against any such possibility. I want to make a deal with you. I'm ready to supply you with the name of the man responsible for the leak and papers proving his guilt. I have them here. In return for which you expect? A quick conclusion to your activities and your return to New York, leaving my name out of your reports. I'm neither a public official nor a philanthropist. I should do nothing about you unless it becomes necessary. You may remove your hand from your pocket. You wouldn't dare shoot me. Now then, the name of the man? James Collier. Proof of his guilt? These. A series of reports on the Committee's meetings in Collier's handwriting. Thank you. Good night, sir. Good night. I hope for your sake that we do not meet again. Sheesh. Archie, answer the... Oh. Hello? Mr. Wolfe? Yes, Archie? I'm at the Collier Place. Since it takes only ten minutes to get there, may I congratulate you on your speed? I've been at the Collier Place for nearly an hour. Doing what? Oh, meeting Claire for one thing, discussing rose buds. Your delay has been explained. Good night. And for another, I was being around when someone got murdered. You laid hands on the murderer? No, the room was dark. The time I got Claire untangled from me and started looking for somebody with a gun, he'd left. I see. And the dead man, of course, is James Collier. No, sorry. Founded it had to be. Who was he? Total stranger. Archie. By not being difficult, there was no identification on him. Strange. A description. Early thirties, height maybe 5'10", weight around 175 pounds. Blonde hair, blue eyes, very natty dresser. Suit custom tailored with a built-in shoulder holster. Don Juan shirts. Manicured but very dirty fingernails. And he... Uh-oh. Company. The police? Mm-hmm. Very well, you tell them whatever you think proper, without mentioning the Governor's Committee, of course. You'll admit them farewell and come to the hotel. Can't I say goodbye to Claire, too? You cannot. Confound you, Archie. Do you think I want to wait up all night? Police were not happy about letting me go, but I threatened to tell you on them so they gave up. You have told me the entire story of what occurred at the Collier Farm, Archie? Mm-hmm. All details. If you like, I wouldn't mind repeating the parts about Claire. Fooey. You may call it fooey, I call it love. By the way, did you know that it was Robert Herrick who wrote that poem? Confound you, you quack. Okay, push your lips around, but you've missed something. I have? Mm-hmm. The burning question of the day. The night, rather. Which is? Where is James Collier? Ah! Stop buying. The cops want him on suspicion of murder. The way it shapes up, he shot our unknown pal and then headed for the nearest border. Nonsense. You mean he didn't shoot our unknown pal? I mean Collier's whereabouts and not a mystery. You know where he is? I know where he is. I don't believe it. You couldn't know. You haven't been out of the hotel. You haven't had any calls. Ah, gee, I use my intelligence. If you had used yours instead of holding the girl... I still wouldn't know where Collier is. Never mind. I'm impressed. What do I do now? You get Mr. Veek on the phone. Huh? He's staying here at the hotel. Oh, old home week. Operator. Mr. Veek, please. Hello. Hello, Mr. Veek. Who is this? Mr. Wolf wants to speak with you. Just a second. Here you are, sir. Thank you. Mr. Veek, where were you at 10 o'clock? Why, on my way to the hotel. You checked in at 10. At 10.15, then came directly to your room. One other question. You have an employee, a man in his early 30s, blond haired, blue eyed, and well dressed. Am I correct? Yes, that is Marshall. Oh, that was Marshall. Good night, sir. Having done that, whatever it meant, we now go to sleep? That's the way we go to the Collier Farm. Okay, but why? Because, Archie, the time has come to cross examine the rabbits. Confound you, Archie. You're not driving a truck. Be careful. Truck drivers are careful. Also, they're courteous. Indeed. Furthermore, they will always stop to help a motorist in time of trouble. Archie, are you training to become a truck driver, or have you fallen in love with a truck driver's daughter? Her name is Suzie, a hair the color of wheat fields at high newt... Never mind turning purple. I'm about to change the subject. Boss, I have a theory. Stick to truck drivers. As follows. Our boy Collier had been selling information to Veek, had a change of heart, and decided to turn ethical. But Veek's man, Marshall, at Veek's orders, tried to apply pressure, so Collier shot him and headed for Canada. And the girls' room? Just to brighten my life. Oh, you mean about her playing sentry? Well, she's in Veek's employ too. Fooey. Don't like my theory. It's charming. It merely happens to be wrong. Merely happens to be... Why is it wrong? Because Archie, of a dead man's dirty fingernails, Marshall's fingernails. Well, you made me bring you to the rabbit hutches. We have arrived. There are the rabbits. Go ahead, cross-examine them. Good many hutches. A large pen for the rabbits to run about in. Notice that they're all cowering at the far end of the pen, ran as we entered. That's because they don't like us, maybe, huh? One of them, however, seems to be friendly. The one up here, and at the corner opposite us. Oh, yeah, there is one here. He's not friendly, Mr. Wolf. Indeed? He's dead. Somebody stole then his skull. Interesting. What's interesting about a dead rabbit? He may be dead now, Archie, but he was friendly. Too friendly. Claire, this is Mr. Wolf. Mr. Wolf, this is Claire. Claire, I'm Archie. Ah, a chair, Archie. A chair. Try this one. Be gentle with it. If you break it, all the early Americans will hate you. It'll survive. Steady. Oh, now then. Mr. Wolf, I'm dreadfully tired. The police have... Ah, idiots. What? For example, do they know that you were posted a sentry outside this house in order to warn James Collier of any intrusion? Well, they don't... I wasn't. Do they know that James Collier and the dead man Marshall were quarrelling? No. Do they know that James Collier had armed himself in preparation for this meeting with the government? That isn't true. It is true. I don't have to say anything. You've already said more than enough with your actions, my dear. What do you mean? According to Archie's report, and Archie's always meticulously accurate, when you and he opened the door of the room in which the murder took place, you screamed at the shots. Well, of course. Any girl would scream with... Then you crung to Archie with sufficient force and for sufficient length of time to prevent him from chasing the murderer. Why? I... Because you had seen and recognized the murderer as the man you loved. It was too dark to see anything. True. Therefore, you didn't have to see the man. You thought you already knew who the killer had to be. That's a lie. You're shielding James Collier, aren't you? I'll never admit any of it. Never. It may not be necessary. Archie. Yes, Mr. Wolf? Get all of that policeman outside and remember what happened to one particular rabbit. Well, look around for freshly dug earth. Midnight. What are we waiting for? A return? Archie's. No, it'll take him longer. Then whose? Mr. Veek's, of course, complete with revolver. Come in, Mr. Veek. It couldn't have been easier. No one outside, only the two of you here. I warned you, Wolf. Fiddlesticks, you merely try to use me as a prop for an alibi and a rationalization for a motive. I don't understand that... Mr. Wolf does. Indeed I do. Did you really think we fool enough to believe your proposal, Mr. Veek? It was plausible. It was nonsense. You pretended you were handling James Collier plus the proofs of his guilt over to me in an effort to keep yourself out of the picture. But your proposition was silly. No matter how much I might have wanted to help you, I would have been powerless once James Collier went before a jury. You are too intelligent not to know that. That couldn't have given you enough to go on. It didn't. You yourself gave me more. I did. When you came to my room, you told me you knew Mr. Goodwin and I had come to Greendale, checked in at the hotel. I did. However, when I phoned you later and asked for an account of your movements between 10 and 10.30, you replied that you had driven to the hotel, signed in and came directly to my room. Obviously, you already knew of my presence in the hotel. How? I... Only one way you could have known. You had seen Archie at some time prior to the time you checked in at the hotel. And the only place where Archie was... Was here, at the farm. Yes, which told me Mr. Veek had been here at the time of Marshall's death. What was Veek doing here? Only one thing. Murder. Then he killed the gunman. Well, the possibility. But Jimmy, I thought he did it. James Collier couldn't have killed Marshall because at the time he was killed, James Collier was already dead. Archie! What's this? Let's play. I'll drop that gun first. My arm! That's nice and cooperative, so... You'll be quiet for a while. The cop is back in the rabbit pen, Mr. Wolf, guarding Collier's grave. Grave, Archie? Yeah. With James Collier in it. Oh. Poor Jimmy. Veek knew the expose was coming, he had to shut Collier up. So he had his gunman, Marshall, kill Collier and bury him in the rabbit run back at the hutches. You spotted that, boss, because of... A dead rabbit. The others scurried away from the man who bore James Collier's body to that lonely spot. But one rabbit overcame his fear, he was too friendly. And got killed for it. There was that and... And the dirty fingernails of Marshall, the gunman who killed and buried James Collier. Your description indicated extreme neatness. The dirty fingernails were at a wrong note. Yeah, indicated he'd been digging. So we know now, don't we? Veek killed his own trigger man to frame a dead man for it. Collier would be thought guilty, he'd be hunted among the living and all the... Oh, I'm sorry, Claire. It's all right, Archie. I didn't love Jimmy. That was all washed up. Mr. Wolf, I understand everything, except why did Jimmy suddenly start staying at the farm with the rabbits? He knew he'd be watched. He couldn't risk conveying his information by telephone or the mails. Nor could he be seen holding conversation with men who might be traced to Veek. But who would suspect a truck driver delivering carrots for the rabbits... as being the go-between for Jimmy Collier and Veek? Nero Wolf. Which is why I hope there's an adequate bed in this house for Mr. Wolf. I'm sure I'll be able to find one. Splendid, Archie. You will have the police remove Mr. Veek and then... And then maybe Claire would like to go gathering rose buds, huh, by moonlight? I would like to. As you go up to bed now, I've seen the moonlight more times than I care to remember. However, while you and Miss Claire stroll through the moonlight, Archie... Yeah? You might remember that rose buds have thorns. You have been listening to the new adventures of Nero Wolf... starring Sidney Greenstreet. Tonight's transcribed story was based on the characters created by Rex Stout. This is an Edwin Fadiman program, produced and directed by J. Donald Wilson. In the cast were Larry Dobkin as Archie Goodwin... and Martha Shaw, Hal Gerard, Herb Butterfield, Howard McNear and Bill Johnstone. Next week at this same time, Nero Wolf and Archie will bring you... The Case of the Impolite Corpse. Don Stanley speaking. Preachheims mean good times on NBC. There's no cover charge at Duffy's Tavern. Just keep your dial on this NBC station this evening as Archie the Manager... played by Ed Gardner and his remarkable friends... serve up another blue plate special of grilled English language, fresh laughs and whimsy a la mode. Another Friday fun favorite is the delightful Life of Riley... starring William Bendix as the beleaguered Chester A. Riley. Now it's Sam Spade. Then the magnificent Montague on NBC.
