with the speed of light, a cloud of dust, and a hearty high old silver, the Lone Ranger. Indian companion Tonto, the mask rider of the plains, led the fight for law and order in the early western United States. The stories of his strength and courage, his daring and resourcefulness, have come down to us through the generations, and nowhere in the pages of history can one find a greater champion of justice. Return with us now to those thrilling days of yesteryear, from out of the past and the thundering hoofbeats of the great horse, Silver, the Lone Ranger rides again. Come till there. Let's go, big fellow. Winter still reigned in the upper regions of the Saddle Rock Mountains. Snow lay deep above the sheer rocky sides of Cedar Pass. It was all in direct contrast to the warm spring sunshine that flooded the valley and the town below. Hamlin was the typical western small town, the usual twin row of buildings fronted at single main street, where hitch racks were crowded and cowpokes lounged under wooden awning. In fact, the citizens were wholly unprepared for the advent of Angus McDonagall. Oh, you ugly, misbegotten beastie. Oh, oh, oh. A very tired mule obeyed his insulting command. And a moment later, a dour and stocky gentleman with twinkling blue eyes dismounted unhurriedly. It was Mr. McDonagall's unusual costume that first attracted attention. The minor shirt, the heavy boots, were common enough sights in Hamlin. But bare legs and hairy knees weren't common. Neither was the bright-colored highland kilt that hung precariously above them. To these comments, as he began to blow vigorously into a tube attached to the pig-shaped tartan bag that he held beneath one arm. The bag was soon inflated, and out of it jutted sundry the ribbon pipe. And out of these, with no warning, suddenly came the strangest sounds ever to echo through Hamlin. Soon, half the town was gathered around Angus McDonagall. Who is Angus McDonagall? He's a prospector. Comes into town every two or three months. Yeah, but I never saw him rigged out like this before. Where's that thing with Jiggy's blowing into? I don't know. Sounds like a pass with Wildcats to me. Thank you, my friends. Tis good to see y'all appreciate good music. Give us another tune, Scott! But first, I must tell you me reason I've got sound of the pipes of the old clan McDonagall. Tis to remind you of the three days hence this election day. Didn't forget to cast your vote for an honest and fearless officer of the law. Sheriff Jim Cafferty. Well, didn't he agree with me? No. Nate Willis. It's no surprise to hear you say that. You're one of Boyd Kruger's hired thugs. A gunman and a rascal. Yeah? Listen, you old cook. Jim Cafferty ain't got a prayer to stay on a sheriff in this town. We want a real woman and we're gonna have him. Boyd Kruger! Hey, lass! How about it, boys? We're voting for Kruger. Ain't that right? Didn't he appear for Kenwood Kruger and his gang of the books? I'll tell you. Hey, Paul, I'm talking. Hey, and so are the pipes of McDonagall. McDonagall's pipes were heard in another part of Hamlin, in the kitchen of a small house at the edge of town, where Sheriff Jim Cafferty and his wife, Nora, were eating their midday meal. You hear that, Nora? What, Jim? Well, sounds like... Well, it is. Bagpipes. Oh, I... Uncle Angus. I forgot to tell you. Angus? Is he in town? Oh, I wish your uncle hadn't chosen this exact time for his visit. You mean the election, Jim? Boyd Kruger's been bringing in more gun hawks every day. It's like a keg of powder. And it's bound to blow up. I know. It's worried me. I was telling Uncle Angus about the election and... You shouldn't have done that. Why? Surely he can't... Jim, what's wrong? Ah, nothing. Forgive me, honey. Just nerves, I guess. Let Boyd Kruger get my goat. I should be doing my job, whether I'm re-elected sheriff or not. No one in their right mind will vote for Kruger. Everybody knows what kind of a man here. His imported gunman will vote for him. And they're legal residents, because he claims they're all working as dealers in his saloon. Oh, Jim, what can you do? Nothing, except keep my eyes open. Well, Chet Billings from the three-bar range has a large herd of steers better down east of town. And that might be a temptation to some of Kruger's men. So I'm watching it day and night. In the meantime, I'll finish my lunch and see how Uncle Angus is making out. Some people think a speech is about Boyd Kruger. Why, you... Nate, wait a minute. There's a mud puddle in the middle of the street. Dip the old coot into that. Good idea, Yuba. Come on. No, the point of the whole thing is this. A vote for caverty is a vote for law and order. A vote for Boyd Kruger means skunk-duggery, murder and graft. Need to say more. Now, you loco scotchman. Of course, I'm going to stop your yapping right now. Lush. He's that ignorant good man, Nate Willis. Yeah? Aye. Only a man with knee brains calls a scotchman a scotchman. No matter how you say it, Grandpa, this is the way it feels. Grab him, Yuba. Get behind him. Now, grab him, Yuba. Come on. Do it your foot, mate. Kick his teeth, eh? Yeah, I'll put that. No. You not kick, old fella. Well, look who's honing in. A redskin. Get away from here, Inchon, before you get hurt. No. I'll do not lick. I guess we got two of them to clean up on. How about it, Nate? Sure. Let's pull him where the scotchman is. Come on. What do we do, Newman? This is the hem of my knees. You feel better? Aye. Thanks to ye, my aborigine's friend. And me bring the... Oh, Belang. Oh, you've been hurt. Belang, what happened? Just two wee altercations, lad. There's nothing serious. But you're covered with mud. You killed his time. Politics is a dirty business, lass. I was making a speech urging the citizens to vote for Jim Cafferty. When Trois took Nate Willis. Nate Willis? You mean he and another one of Kruger's men beat you up? Aye. And I might have succeeded. My redskin friend saved the day. Oh, thank you so much for helping me. That's all right. And I'm glad you're not seriously hurt, Angus. But I'm sorry that you... Why did you do it? You've been drinking, Angus? Nay, lad. Not a droop. Don't scold him, Jim. He was trying to help you. I know, but I didn't want any trouble with Kruger's men until I... That's why I'm watching that herd for steers tonight. If I can only catch them red-handed before the election, I've got... I'm sorry, lad. Very, very sorry. That's all right. What's done is done. But don't do any more electioneering. Aye. Now, come on into the house. I'll clean that mud off of you. And your Indian friend, I... Why, Jim, where'd he go? Redskin? He's over there mounting his horse. Tis a shame he didn't wait. Any man who fights like him should have been born a Scutman. Oh, what's got old fella? Been gone a long time, Tonto. Did you get the supplies? Now, me bring him. Oh, good. Tonto, meet old fella in town. Him get in fight. Me help him. Never see fella like him before. What do you mean, Tonto? Well, him wear skirt like squaw. Blow into big bags that make noise like coyote with leg cotton crap. Uh, me not savvy. He must have run into a Scutman playing a bagpipe. Who is it, you know? Ah. Me take him home to Sheriff's house. Hear about plenty trouble. Town full of crooks. Lawmen plenty worried. Him say, maybe them try to steal cattle tonight. Big herd east of town. I've heard something about the situation here in Hamlin. Lloyd Kruger's running for sheriff against Jim Cafferty. He's probably imported a lot of outsiders to force the election his way. Ah, that's right. I didn't intend to stay very long here in the valley. We'll wait over until tomorrow anyway. Ah. Sheriff Cafferty may need some help tonight. Good night, boss. We got the boys together. We're ready to ride. All right. Now, do you think you and Yuba and four other gun hands could cut a few steers out of that three-bar herd without getting your other eye blacked? Oh, boss, I've told you a dozen times what happened this afternoon wasn't our fault. That redskin sneaked up behind us. And he must have been swinging a tomahawk. That's not the way I heard it. All right, cut out those steers. And keep your eyes open for redskins. Come on, trial your broth. We got work to do. Listen carefully. Aye. That's the three-bar herd right ahead of us. I've got deputies spotted on the north and south side. I'll watch the west flank. Aye. You wait right here. If any of Kruger's men try a rustling trick, we'll have them in the pocket. Lashman. We will indeed. Now, if you spot them, if they pass you here, signal me by firing your gun. You understand? Aye. No fear, lad. I ken your instructions. Oh, I hope so. Keep out of sight now. And don't make any noise. Who's the old gun ready? Me think, man. He must have it. What's wrong? Behind rock, he's the old fella. How? Lashman. You're the aborigines. He gave me a turn. Who's the man with you? He's wearing a mask. A thug, an outlaw. Put down your gun. I'm a friend of Tartal's. He told me all about you. Ah, that's right. Orr, I didn't ken your mask. Don't worry about it. Is he out here? Aye. We're watching for a lot of them. It must be them Kruger and Steve. An old trick. There is a commotion on the far side of a herd, then cut out cattle from the near side. Come on. You mean we're again to war? Not exactly war, but if the sheriff's nearby, we may be able to help him. Lash! If it's war, we march it for. I need my sack to run. Wait a minute. How don't I have guns? You only... May guns, man. The pipes of McDonough... No, no, don't. Stop it. He'll stampede the cattle. They're headed this way. Pause on the first act of our Lone Ranger story. Before the next exciting scenes, please permit us to pause for just a few moments. We'll continue our story. As the stampeding cattle bore down upon them, the Lone Ranger realized that the only chance for escape was to reach their horses quickly. Whoosh! There must be a minion of those longhorn beasties. It doesn't seem like that many if they trample us. They've got to run and run fast. Come on. What? Here's the minion case. Don't fall. Hurry. Steady. Easy, Silver. Here. Give me your hand. Hey! There you are. Come on, Silver. Up! Some of Kruger's men. I know it was. They came in from the south and started to cut out some steers. We could have cornered them. But right at that critical moment, your bird-brained Uncle Angus began blowing his bagpipe. Oh, Jim. So the herd stampeded, the rustler skinned out, and I lost my last chance to get something on Kruger before the election. Uncle Angus? What happened to him? I don't know. Like as not, he's still running. I'm so sorry, Jim. I'm sure he didn't do it on purpose. Then it's the first time in history a bagpipe ever played by itself. And I hope it's the last. And you're calling yourselves cowpudgers. Gun hands. How do we know that local Scotchman's gonna be out there a-blowing his bagpipe? You didn't. But you said yourself you saw Cafferty and some deputies riding in from the west. Suppose they've nailed one of you. Now, listen, boy. Cafferty was just as surprised as we were. Stampeding the herd must have been the old man's idea. Well, maybe so. I've got over 200 of you yahoos on my payroll. Now, do you think you can keep out of trouble till after election's over, day after tomorrow? All right, then get out of here. I'm tired of looking at you. There's no doubt about it. You saved my life, man. And I'll be forever indebted to you. No, Angus. I thought and I were facing our own lives as well as yours. It was the excitement. When he heard the gunfire, I thought he was back at the old regiment in the Highlands. We always marched into battle with the scale of the pipes. I'm afraid this was a different kind of battle, Angus. Aye. And though I've disgraced myself with my niece and her husband, the sheriff. Oh, if it was an accident, I'm sure they'll forgive you. Ah, nay. Poor man is at the mercy of Kruger and his thoughts. Ah, how many men has Kruger brought into town? Over 200. They'll win the election because every one of the rats will vote for him. Yes, that's true. Aye. It would be a sad day for the town of Hamlin. If only there were some way to drive out the rats. Diving out two-legged rats is not as easy as I... Wait a minute, Angus. Don't you remember a long time ago, there was another town of the... Didn't you, Ken? You're talking about a fairy tale. Yes, that's right. And, Ken, you're logic, son. My idea isn't exactly logic. We found a couple of small gold nuggets up north. Are they still in the saddlebag? Ah. Ah, ah, me get up. Good. A drinking man? Well, that's, ah, maybe a droop or two for my stomach's sake. Do you think you could pretend to be drunk? Aye. But, ah, I kind of see the good pretense in matters like that. Ah, perhaps it would be best to... No, we can't take the chance. You're speaking a little, man. I'll explain it all in detail later. Ah, do you know where Cedar Pass is? Aye. A narrow and dangerous canyon. At this time of year, tons of snow and ice may fall at any moment. That's right. Ah, here. Here, gold nuggets. Thanks, Tonto. Now, listen carefully, Angus. Here's a plan that may help to keep Jim Cafferty as sheriff of Ham... It was late the following afternoon when Angus McDonago entered the Palace Saloon in Hamlet. His entrance was quiet enough, but his actions demanded attention. Boosh, lads. Pay yourselves to the bar. The drinks are on me. Yuba and Nate watched this unusual occurrence. A short time later reported to Boyd Kruger. I don't believe it. Nobody's mined any gold in the saddle rocks for over 20 years. McDonago's mined some. He's made a strike. The old gents downstairs right now with a big bag full of nuggets. It can't be true. Listen, boss. Did you ever hear of a Scotchman letting gold nuggets fall on the floor and being too busy to pick them up? No, but I still... Unless he really had a gold mine. Well, suppose the old fool has made a strike. What of it? Nothing. Except me and the rest of the boys are going to trail him when he leaves town. Well, if there's gold in those mountains, we can file claims, too. Don't forget you're all working for me. Drawing wages every day. Not the kind of wages we can make in a gold mine. But wait till the election's over. Then I don't care where you go. The old man's leaving town tonight. We gotta follow him. We'll be back in time to vote tomorrow. Oh, it's too risky. I can't afford to have anything go wrong in the election. I need your votes. I've bought and paid for them. Stop worrying. We'll be back. And I might even stake a claim for you while I'm up there. Riding away from the livery stable on his mule. Good. All right, two armories. Mount up and string out. We gotta keep that old jumper in sight. Yeah. Can't let him get wise for trailing him on... What in the... It's the bagpipe. The old fool's so drunk, he's playing his bagpile. This makes it easy. No matter how far ahead he gets, we can hear that thing and keep on his trail. Yeah, it's a sense. Come on! Two hundred gold-seeking horsemen followed what they thought was a pie-eyed piper. Several hours later, they rode through grim and narrow cedar paths, and they could still hear Angus McDonnell on the trail far ahead. They made it past midnight. How much further is that crazy scotchman gonna go? Whether we care, as long as he's heading for a gold mine. And stopped riding. Oh, oh there. Oh. Timon, you're finally on your way up. To your tunnel. You're exhausted. That's all right, but we've got to hurry. You can ride double with me. Did you find the blasting powder infuses in my minor shack? Yes, everything's set. Providing we get back to the passing time. Steady, Silver. Thank you, Mark. There you are. Far from here, we found the mule. Hey, Yuba. Yeah, there you are. Any sign of him? No, I can't figure it out. Not hiding the hair of the old goat. Just like he sprouted wings and flew. He's got to be here. There's no place else to go. All of you spread out and start hunting. It's kind of spooky, mate. It's just like something. What was that? What? Look, the path. Somebody blasted the snow on one side of the path. Well, lucky thing we weren't under it. What do you mean lucky? We're bottled up in here. It'll take us at least a week to dig our way through that snow slide. Who's got a hole, fella? Very big fella. Well, here we are, Angus. You're home. Just wondering if it's safe for me to go in. Oh, I'm sure it is. Do you recall? Jim was mighty angry with me. I stampeded the castle. I don't think he's angry anymore. You see, I stopped by here earlier this evening to see him. Jim wasn't in, but I talked to his wife and explained everything. Aye. Then I'll risk it. You still haven't told me your name, man. It isn't important. Ready, Tonto? Ready. Adios, Angus. We turned the ring from the election. I'm still Sheriff of Hamlin. I beat Kruger. He's even sold a saloon and left town. Oh, I'm so glad you... Oh, that trick of Uncle Angus's. It worked like a charm. Kruger's gun hands are still marooned up there in Cedar Pass. Aye, lad. It would take a lot of digging to get through all the snow. I sure owe you an apology, Uncle Angus. How'd you ever think of it? Nay, it wasn't me, lad. It was a tall gentleman who wears a black mask. Tall men, a black mask? What are you talking about? That's right, Jim. He came by here to see you last night. You were busy downtown, so... So he told me what Uncle Angus and he were going to do. There's nae doot to man's a genius. Not since I left Scootland have I seen anyone like him. The way he handles his guns, the way he rides the white stallion... Now, wait a minute. Tall men wearing a black mask and who rides a white stallion. Well, that must be... You're right, Jim. Look, he gave me a silver bullet to prove it. Well, I'll be done. What's that? Silver bullet? Well, that makes me sad. Vurra, vurra sad. Why, Uncle Angus? What do you mean? The man handles guns like a true Highlander. And he rides a horse like the finest cavalryman in the old regiment. I was hoping he was a countryman of mine. Well, maybe he is, Uncle Angus. Did you ask him? Nay, lass. You just blasted all my hopes. No true Scotsman would give away silver bullets. Turd is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated. The Lone Ranger Incorporated is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated. The Lone Ranger Incorporated is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated. The Lone Ranger Incorporated is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated. The Lone Ranger Incorporated is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated. The Lone Ranger Incorporated is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated. The Lone Ranger Incorporated is a copyrighted feature of The Lone Ranger Incorporated.
