Countdown for blast off. X minus five, four, three, two, X minus one, fire. From the far horizons of the unknown come transcribed tales of new dimensions in time and space. These are stories of the future. Adventures in which you'll live in a million could be years on a thousand maybe worlds. The National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Galaxy Science Fiction Magazine presents X minus one. Tonight the Murray Leinster story, If You Was a Mocklin. Up to the last minute I can't imagine that Mocklin is going to be the first planet that humans get off of. Moving fast, breathing hard, and sweating copious. There isn't any reason for it. Everything was all quiet at the trading post. I was sitting on a front porch while Deeth. He's the Mocklin clerk. Looks a lot like a guy named Casey used to be a wiper on the Palmyra. He comes out on the porch. Good morning, Deeth. How's business? Not so good. There were a few wood Mocklins in this morning. Yeah, I saw. Kind of nice looking. Big saucer eyes. What makes the noses wiggle like rabbits? I don't know, sir. I'm not a woods Mocklin. Oh, sure. It's no offense. They buy much? No, they didn't. They said the prices were too high. Oh, yeah, they said they can get the same goods at the other trading post for half price. Yeah, it's kind of hard to run a nice little monopoly for the company with another trading post opening up at half price. What is this? Look at that little kid playing in the mud. You mean the Mocklin kid? It's my cousin's niece. I can't get over those little kids with the droopy mustaches like old man Bland. I gotta laugh every time. Well, I understand, but you see, Mocklins are getting much more human every day. Hey, look at that. They go to trees on the landing field. Yeah, but the relief ship isn't due for a month. I never knew those trees to get up and walk away if there wasn't a ship though, man. Yeah, there goes old Sally pulling up her roots. Well, this can't be any routine ship. I wish Brooks was back from the hells. Hey, Captain Haney, over here. Yeah, nice to see you all again. Friends. Yeah, sure, sure. Friends, friends. I wish those Mocklins were a little less friendly each time. It's like being a movie star. Hey, what's that? We didn't sign a requisition for anything like that. Red hair and everything else. Relax, Brinkley. That is Inspector Caldwell. She's a troubleshooter for Sam company. They must have finally read those reports. Brooks keeps signing that. Look out for her. She's oh, well, good morning, Miss Caldwell. Inspector Caldwell, please. This is Joe Brinkley. He's the assistant manager of the company post. Where's Brooks? He's up in the mountains, ma'am. We should have been here. I'm on Mocklin to check into this matter of a competitive trading post. Who's back of it? The company is supposed to have exclusive trading rights. Brooks is trying to find out. The Mocklins around the place always say the humans are off somewhere hunting or something. We've never seen them. Hey, take the ladies lugging. Yes, sir. It's a pleasure. He looks a little familiar, your clerk. He's a Mocklin, but he looks a lot like a man used to be a wiper on a Palmyra Casey. I think he's on the Aldebaran run now. Please, please conduct me to the trading post. That afternoon, Brooks come down out of the hills with a bunch of woods Mocklins that were guiding them. I took Inspector Caldwell over to meet him. He gets one look at her red hair and outer equipment and he stops short. Hey, what's this? She Mocklin? I beg your pardon. This is Inspector Caldwell. She come in on a Palmyra today. This is Brooks, the head trader. Well, am I glad to see you. I guess they finally read my reports in sector headquarters. You've come to check my request that the planet be abandoned? Not at all. Mocklin has great potentialities, friendly natives. Trade should continue and increase. I explained. All I'm interested in is why you allowed a competitive post to be established in our exclusive territory. My reports cover that. Haven't you read them? Of course not. I was given a briefing on the situation here and told to correct it. Well now, let's get to it. Do they cut prices? 50%. But lots of Mocklins still trade with us just out of friendship. They're real friendly, these Mocklins. Now I'd like to know just... Excuse me, Mr. Brinkley. What is it, Dave? A girl just brought you a compliment. Oh? Well now send her in and get a present for her. Yes, sir. Uh, 50%. Well, if they want a trade war, we'll give it to them. We can cut prices if we have to. We have all the resources of the company behind this. My dear Miss Caldwell, if you'd read any of my... Inspector Caldwell. Here she is, Mr. Brinkley. Compliments, sir. Compliments. Wow. Let's see him. He's asleep. Well, look at that. Ears like mine. Same bastion, nose and everything. What do you know? Gitchy, gitchy, gitchy. Hey, what's your name? Marano. I can't remember ever seeing you before. Well, that's the way it goes. Hey, take her in the post and give her a present. This way. Thanks for the compliment. I'm greatly honored. Yeah, it's real cute, ain't it? Real human. Human? Brinkley, you are going to be transferred out of here the instant the Palmyra gets back. Why? You mean that girl? I'm giving her a present. What's the matter? That's all you think about it? The callousness you're revolting. Miss Caldwell, I'm afraid maybe you don't exactly understand about parallel evolution here in Markland. I gather it's been parallel enough. That will be all on that subject, if you please. In the morning, I shall want to go and inspect that other trading post. We set off for the trading post the next day. Brooke stayed behind on the kind of he was peeved that she hadn't read his report. Anyway, she was cute as a bug and he resented anyone with a figure like that in authority over him, especially without reading his report. I tried to explain to Miss Caldwell that we just couldn't go in and rip up the opposition post. Why not? They're poaching. Markland's imitate humans. If we start trouble, they'll start it too. Mayhem, murder, theft, bigamy. Bigamy? You're worried about that? Listen, Miss Caldwell, you've got to understand about Markland evolution. I'm not interested. Yeah, here, wait a minute. Now, this is a nest bush, see? There's about a dozen nests on it. Now, only about two of them are ripe. Look. Oh, there's a bird. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to tell you. Now, see, the bush grows nests for the cacklebird and the bird, well, fertilizes around the bush. It's even staving. See, that's the way evolution works on Markland, like we were trying to tell you. Mr. Brinkley, I am not interested in learning about the birds and the bees on Markland or any other planet from you. Now, let's get on to that trading post. Naturally, when we got there, there was only a couple of Marklands hanging around. They told us the same story about the humans having gone off somewhere hunting donderflies. When we got back to the company post, Inspector Caldwell, furious as a wet cacklebird, marched right into Brooks. I have just ordered a price cut on all items on sale by 75 percent. I've also ordered unlimited credit for Markland customers. They want a trade war over there? I'll give it to them. But you don't understand. There's a whole planet where they could have put another trading post without being discovered. Why put it so close to us? That furnishes them with a ready-made market for human trade goods, and it furnished them with Marklands trained to be interpreters and clerks. And it furnished them with a Markland head clerk who is a very handsome young man, Mr. Brooks. He not only resembles you in every feature, but he even has a good many of your mannerisms. You should be very proud. Goodbye. That's funny. Like me, huh? That's right. Spitting image. Funny as folks never brought him for a compliment present. How good's the likeness? If he was wearing your clothes, I'd swear it was you. Maybe... Joe, remember that time you went off hunting with Deeth and his folks? Yeah, sure. We were after dunderflies. We caught about six of them. You were wearing Markland clothes, weren't you? Well, you know how they are. You're insulted if you don't. Listen, did you come back after one day for tobacco and a bath? No. No, we were way over at Tunleib Hills. Some Markland got killed and we had to bury them. It took two days. Well, during that week while you were off wearing Markland clothes, somebody came back here wearing your clothes. He got some tobacco and went out again. He looked just like you, Joe. Exactly. Nobody suspected it wasn't you. Why should he want to do that? He might have been checking to see if he could fool me. Oh, that's a situation, isn't it? I haven't mentioned it before, but I've been guessing it's something like this. Marklands like to be human, and they have kids that look human. Look at the difference between Deeth and a woods Markland. Well, maybe they can want to be smart like humans. Pretty soon they are, or their kids are. That rival trading post. You figure there aren't any humans running it. They're practicing with that. You mean they might figure to get rid of us and have a couple of Marklands take our place. I don't believe that. Marklands like humans. They wouldn't harm humans for anything. They like to be just like them. Listen, Joe, Miss Caldwell is the first human woman on Markland, isn't she? Yeah. Why? She's got red hair. The first woman the Marklands see and with red hair. You know how Marklands admire humans. With luck, it ought to turn up soon. Boy, she's going to take it hard if it does. Women hate to be wrong. But it's about our only chance. Listen, Joe, we've got to have some check between us. What for? Well, if there's a Markland that looks like me and one that looks like you, we better have a signal. Look, I'll cough twice, like this. And you whistle back. That way we'll know it's us. Okay. Try it. Good, good. That way we'll know we're us. The next morning, Brooke starts off to visit the other trading post and see to Markland that it looks so much like him. Before he goes, we do our little routine. It's about two weeks until the Palmyra is due back. That's pretty close figuring, waiting for what we're waiting for. I was thinking how good life was on Markland up to now. And that made me kind of a little sad. I thought, well, I'm going to have to go back to the old days. But it's the end. There's no doubt about it. Markland sure admire humans. They produce kids that look like them. You can't help liking Marklands. But I can see what Brooke's means. Markland's loose among humans, outsmarting them as their kids grow up, just about taking over in the galaxy. When they come back from the other trading post, we went through the secret business again. The meantime, Inspector Caldwell was busy with her trade war. She cut prices once, twice, finally six times until three days before the Palmyra is due back, our goods are marked at exactly 1% of what they cost the month before. Brooks was getting more and more nervous. Seemed like he was falling kind of in love with his snappy little inspector. He was getting jumpy, waiting for her to get her business going. She was making out merchandise requisitions one morning when Deeth came in smiling friendly at her. Inspector Caldwell? Oh, what is it, Deeth? There's a compliment for you. What? Three of them. What is he talking about? Joe, this is it. Deeth, show him in. Now look, I haven't got time for public relations. These inventories of... Ah, here we are. Inspector Caldwell, three compliments. Compliment, compliment, compliment. Now, let's see them. Very pretty, very human, no? Oh, no. No, no, that's impossible. No. Very pretty. Red hair, all three of them. Red hair. Very pretty red hair. Same as human lady. Very pretty. All right, Deeth, take her out and give her some presents. This way, come on. But that's impossible. Those babies, three of them, they all, they couldn't. They do. They look exactly like you. That's what we were trying to tell you. I've only been here a month. Marklin babies get born real fast. They sure admire humans. It's kind of friendly when you think about it. You mean they can make their babies look like anybody they want? It was all in my reports. They've got a queer sort of personality. They've got a queer sort of evolution here on Marklin. Babies here inherit desired characteristics, not acquired characteristics, desired ones. And what could be more desirable than you? Red hair and all. Oh, but I thought, I mean, you and Brinkley. You couldn't help it, dear, really. But I hated you. I thought that... Look, darling. And Joe. Yeah? Do me a favor, will you? Sure, what? Get out of here. Oh, okay. And stay away for a while. Sure. Only one thing. What? That's... Okay. Then I'll leave you two together. About two days later, the Palmyra boomed down out of the sky. We were all packed up waiting on the field when the trees finished getting out of the way. I kept thinking, no matter what, Marklins sure are friendly. And they sure do admire humans. I could see them crew members with Liberty heading off from the field with a whole gang of laughing, singing Marklins, following each one of them. After a while, Cap Haney came over on a freight truck. It's a pleasure, I tell you, to see these Marklins. I just came here from Welch's planet. The natives there are suspicious, unfriendly, and if you're not watching, they'll steal your gold teeth. Eh, but Marklins... Captain Haney, don't give orders to unload your cargo. What do you mean? We are abandoning the post. What? We are leaving Marklin, completely. Sam Company pulling out when there's still a mill credit to be made? I don't believe it. I have authority to order the move, and Mr. Brooks has convinced me of the necessity for it. Now, Inspector, I know the company doesn't like to give in to competition. There isn't any competition. Well, I thought... Miss Fowle's right. That other trading post is purely a Marklin enterprise. They bought our goods from us and pretended to sell them at half price, and we got our prices, so they bought more goods from us and went on. Some Marklin must have thought it'd be nice to be a smart businessman, so his kids would be smart businessmen. Too smart. We'll close up this post before the Marklins think of something else. What? What do they think of? If they got loose from this planet, if they can pass as humans, their kids could take over human civilization. How would you like that? Hmm. I see. Yeah. You'd better make ready to blast off, Captain. Yeah, but I got the B section off on shore liberty. Men are scattered all over the place. With Marklins? Sure, with Marklins. You know how it is. Regular party. Fancy Marklin clothes, food, liquor. Captain, you'd better sound the emergency recall. Yeah, yeah. I see what you mean right away. Hrrr, hrrr, hrrr, hrrr, hrrr. Well, that accounts for all but about five of them. They're coming across the field now. Keep that line straight for the hatch. We gotta count off. Four, five. Yeah, they're all in line. I'll check against the roster. Wait a minute. There's another one coming. Look. Why that three? It can't be. I've got 38 men lined up already. 38. That's a full count. That's a human. He's wearing Marklin clothes. It looks like Pete Werber from the engine crew. Hey, hey, hey, wait. Wait for me. Wait. But it can't be. Werber's already checked in. There he is in line. Wait, wait, wait for me. Hey, well, where'd you come from? I couldn't find my clothes. You see, I was in these Marklin clothes when the signal went off. I was trying to find my clothes. Werber, look over there in the line. Where? Hey, that's my clothes. That guy, he looks just like me. Now what's the idea? Hey, you, come over here. Yes, sir. What's the idea? All right, all right. You caught me. I'm a Marklin. He's all my clothes. Why did you do it? We Marklins like humans so much, I thought it would be nice to make a trip to Earth and see more humans. How come he looks like me? My parents planted five years ago when you came here first. They made me look like this wonderful human and hid me till now. You'd give me back my clothes. Of course, of course. I wouldn't want to make any difficulties for humans. He took it as a joke on him. He talked English as good as anybody. It was hard to tell which was the Marklin and which the human guy. So we let him keep the human uniform, and he was very grateful. We took off after that, and the Marklins stood around and laughed and waved and threw flowers as we closed the hatches. Pretty soon the Palmyra was pushing up through the outer space. And the Marklins were just standing there, and we closed the hatches. Pretty soon the Palmyra was pushing up through the atmosphere. And just before the auxiliary circuits went on during the jump to overdrive, we all stood around in the Astrogator's dome with a screen turned up to high mag and watched as Marklin faded into a round cantaloupe behind us. It's a shame. Sure was a pretty planet. Real friendly. Too friendly. We almost took a Marklin off with us. The other crew had been on Marklin long enough to have a double. Five years is a safety margin. Takes them that long to grow up. We were lucky, huh, Joe? Huh? What? I said we were lucky. Yeah. Yeah. We sure are. I guess I was the only one who felt a little different from the others about leaving Marklin. I mean, Marklin's a swell folks, and it seemed a shame. There'll be an order out that no human ship is allowed to land on Marklin. But I was thinking, I'll save my money, and those compliments, those three little kids that looked just like Inspector Caldwell, in about five years, they'll be able to land on Marklin. Those three little kids that looked just like Inspector Caldwell, in about five years, they'll be grown. Now buy me a little private ship and shove off for Marklin again. And I'll pick me one of those three redheaded gals and marry her Marklin style, and bring her out to a human colony planet. We'll have kids with brains, top-level brains. That's easy. If she wants it, that's the way the kids will be born. I'll have to bring other Marklins out too and start them passing for humans. My kids are going to need other Marklins to marry, aren't they? It's not that I don't like humans. I do. If the fellow I look like, Joe Brinkley, hadn't gotten killed accidental on a hunting trip, I never would have thought of taking his place and being Joe Brinkley. That's what I was thinking when Brooke suddenly got an idea. Wait a minute. Joe, you and I were on Marklin more than five years. Yeah? So? One thing. And everything's all right. I mean, you can't blame me for wanting to live among humans, can you? Wouldn't you, if you was a Marklin? You have just heard X-1, presented by the National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Galaxy Science Fiction Magazine, which this month features another fascinating For Your Information column written by Willie Lay. Galaxy Magazine, on your newsstand today. Tonight by transcription, X-1 has brought you If You Was a Marklin, a story from the pages of Galaxy written by Murly Leinster and adapted for radio by Ernest Kanoy. Featured in the cast were Joseph Julian, Patricia Wheel, Carl Weber, Ralph Camargo, Helen Gerald, Stan Early, John Marley, and Dick Jennevar, your announcer, Fred Collins. X-1 was directed by Daniel Sutter and is an NBC Radio Network production. Music Next week, listen to Project Trojan, an original story by Ernest Kanoy on X-1. Follow the news with Chad Huntley tonight on NBC Radio.
