In a moment you'll hear James Stewart as the sick shooter. Just one of the many fine programs brought to you Sundays on NBC. Later this evening listen to the NBC Star Playhouse with two of your favorite stars. Hear a stroke of fate in the story of what might have happened if fate had reversed historical facts. And be sure to keep tuned for the dramatic story of Last Man Out. It's a wonderful lineup of great programs, all of them heard only on NBC. James Stewart as the sick shooter. The man in the saddle is angular and long-legged. His skin is sundyed brown. The gun in his holster is gray steel and rainbow mother of pearl. His handle unmarked. People call them both the sick shooter. The NBC Radio Network presents James Stewart as the sick shooter. A transcribed series of radio dramas based on the life of Brit Ponset. The Texas Plainsman who wandered through the western territories leaving behind a trail of still remembered legends. I confess thee of thy sin, des demona, for indeed thou art to die. My lord of the law, have mercy on me. I say amen. And you, mercy too. I never did offend you in my life. O burdened woman! Oh! May, may I speak the truth. I never did offend. You're offending us, lady. Hey, who is this guy Shakespeare anyway? Oh, banish me, my lord, but kill me not. Don't, trumpet. Kill me tomorrow, but let me live tonight. Feet say, kill or deny. Yeah, let's get it over with. Nay, nay, my lady, if you strive. But half an hour. Holy mackerel, not another half hour then. Go on, Othello, put her out of her misery. How about our misery? Ladies, ladies and gentlemen, ladies and gentlemen. He said me don't mean us. Ladies and gentlemen, it appears that our fesbian efforts do not meet with your approval. Appears? My company and I have played before all the crowned heads of Europe. We thought the enlightened community of Virtue City would welcome an opportunity to witness the works of the immortal bard, as performed by Madame de la Seine, the distinguished French actress, and by your humble servant. We were mistaken to err as human to forgive divine. I forgive you. The performance is concluded. Good night. Hey, now, just a minute. You mean you ain't going on to the end of this thing? You have understood me correctly, sir. What Shakespeare gonna think? Yeah, what about the money we paid? Do we get it back? Silence, silence, please. My company has more than earned a meager pittance. You ain't earned nothing until the show's over. That's right. Either you finish up your act and up there, you give us our dough. This ultimatum is outrageous. I reject it, fatso. Just you stay up there on that stage, mister. I said... Please, sir, sir, please. There are ladies present. Someone might be injured. You going on with the show, ain't you? Well? Err, err, err, the performance will continue. But under protest, sir, under severe protest. I hadn't been back to Virtue City since the second silver strike. First mine's played out, oh, ten, fifteen years ago, and the town has been crumbling away like a stale loaf of bread. But the new strike last spring, oh, the looks of things is even bigger than the first one. The old stores all opened up again, half a dozen new ones been built. The new railroad account for some of the prosperity. Anyway, that's why I'd come to town. I was supposed to meet the train from Chicago and pick up some spare parts for the pump at the Round Y Ranch where I was working. The train wasn't doing until the next day, so I headed over to the hotel to see about getting a room. The clerk was sitting behind the registration counter looking through some kind of a contraption. I didn't know what it was. Sure had never seen a gadget like that before. Err, excuse me. Oh, oh, sorry, mister. Didn't know you was there. Well, I'd like to... I just got me a new set of pictures. I sort of anxious to try them out. My pictures? My stereoscope. Oh, wow. Why, you've seen a stereoscope before, ain't you, man? No, no, can't say that. Why, it's the newest thing. All the folks back east have got them. Here, just let me show you, huh? Now, you wait a minute. Just wait until I find the agri-force. Yeah, yeah, here it is. Now, you just look through the front end there, huh? That's right. That's right. Well, well... I'll be doggone. Why, it just looks like that water's come right at you, doesn't it? Why, you'd think it was real. You'd think you were right there. Here, here, let me show you another one. Now, let me see. Oh, yeah, yeah, pyramids. The only fellow in town got the pyramids. The pyramids? Yeah, they're in Egypt, you know. There, now, how's that? Why, just look at... I can't believe it. Well, that fellow's standing out in front of the pyramids. It's just like you could touch him. You could just reach out and touch him. I've never seen anything like that before. Yeah, you just wait until I find that red skin to shoot in there. That guy, he ways aimed it. You didn't know it was a picture. You'd swear he was looking at... My key, if you please. Oh, sure, Mr. Plunkett. Sure. Andrew may as well have my bill ready. We'll be checking out this afternoon. Oh, I thought you were supposed to give another show tonight. The performance has been canceled. Hey, hey, Arch. Hey, beg your pardon, sir. Arch, well, don't you remember me? You seem to have the advantage, sir. I don't believe that... Britt! Britt Plunkett! Well, what the thunder you doing in Virtue City, Arch? Boy, I haven't seen you since... Since our triumphal tour of Texas. Wasn't it, Britt? What? When we were the honored guests of the governor, my company and I. You remember he insisted that we stay at the executive mansion? Uh, no, Arch. I shall never forget the warmth of our reception there. The people of Texas have a true appreciation of the art of the drama, unlike some of our more recent audiences. Audiences? Well, come along, old boy. Come along. You must join us for a spot of tea. Marguerite would be so delighted to see you again. Marguerite? Who's she? My lovely wife. Oh. Don't tell me you've forgotten her. Well, I... Well, no. I thought her name was... We've taken the presidential suite, of course. If you'll just follow me... Well, now, hold on, Arch. I've got to see about a room for myself. Nonsense, nonsense. The clerk will take care of these trivial details. This way, dear boy. This way. Ah, here we are, my dear Britt. Enter. Hey, what the Sam Hills happened to you, Arch? What happened to your voice? It's all in good time, my good man, all in good time. Marguerite? That's you, Arch? Yes, madere. I've brought someone with me. Oh, I have been, uh, all you say, taking a little nap to snooze dinner. For prayer. Why, you son of a gun, what... Well, where did you come from? Oh, Maggie, oh, yeah. Ha-ha, he was downstairs in the lobby, Mag. I had to get him up here fast before he spilled the beans. Oh, that's right. You don't know we're in the profession, do you, Britt? The what? Show business, Britt. Show business. Maggie and I are actors now. We've got our own company. No. Ha-ha. Permit me to introduce myself. Archibald Plunkett, late of London, Paris, New York, and, for an unpleasant moment, Virtue City. Plunkett, eh? Couldn't keep on calling myself Archie Plunkett. Once I gave up the dry goods emporium and started acting. Oh, I see. And, uh, this charming lady is my wife, the toast to the continent, Marguerite de la Seine. What do you mean you changed your name, too, Maggie? Oh, just fancied it, I'll suspect. I used to be Maggie Rivers before I married Arch. Well, we looked on a map. There's a French river called the Seine, so, um... Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. Don't seem fair somehow. What do you mean, Britt? Well, your folks give you a hand. All seems like you ought to stick with it. Uh-huh. Not when you're in the profession. Is that so? Sure. Most actors have to change their names. They do? Yeah, lots of them. Well, I guess if it's customary, I... Gee, we're your actors now, huh? Well, Arch wasn't much good at business, Britt, you know that. He always hated to stay in one place. And then when the drought hit, what, we were cleaned out. Yeah, it was right about then Doc Ryder comes through with his medicine show. Remember the Doc, Britt? Oh, yeah. Yeah, sure. His guitar player left him flat. Run off with that girl he used to do the singing, the one with the yellow tights. Yellow tights? I don't think... Oh. Oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah. So the Doc needed somebody to take their place, and well, Maggie always had a real sweet singing voice, and seeing as how we were broke anyhow... Dog on tights never did fit me. Well, you're not still with the medicine show, are you? Oh, we sure ain't. Anyhow, we struck out on our own, started into a serious act, you know, Shakespeare. Shakespeare? Oh. To be or not to be, that is the question. Oh, I see. Whether, it is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take up arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing them. That's pretty good. Then, then. That's Hamlet. Oh, yeah, oh, that's... To tell you the truth, Brither, it was gone, it appears, the melancholy dame this very evening. That circumstances have compelled us to abandon the production. Is that so? Yeah, there was a little trouble during our performance of Othello last night. You mean the post didn't like the show? Well, when they started shooting up at the ceiling, that was the impression that we got. Well, now they shouldn't have done that. I couldn't agree with you more completely. Anyway, we're going on to Rocky Falls. Maybe folks there will have a little more... Oh, who on earth? Right, now you won't see him, then. You won't give us away. Oh, no, no, of course not. Your servant, sir? Forgive me for intruding. Are you Archibald Blanquet, the actor? I am he. Delighted to meet you, Mr. Blanquet. And what may I do for you, sir? I happened to be spending the day in Virtue City, and I saw a theatrical poster advertising a performance of Hamlet, one of my favorite plays. Unfortunately, when I tried to buy tickets, I was informed that your company isn't appearing this evening. That is correct, sir. A sudden change in our schedule. We have so many engagements, we're unable to fill them all. I understand, Mr. Blanquet. I understand. The vagaries of show business. See, I happen to be in the theater myself. Indeed? Yes, my card. Oh, thank you. I'm sorry I won't have the opportunity of witnessing your performance. Good afternoon. Good afternoon, sir. Good afternoon, sir. Old faker. Why, I bet he's no more in show business than you are, Britt. Probably thought we'd give him a couple of free passes. Oh! Oh, no! Oh, Gorge, what's the matter? Oh, no, no, no. It couldn't. I've seen things. Britt? Hmm? Here. Britt, what's it look like to you? The name on this card. What's it say? Oh, I'll see. It says Barnum. P.T. Barnum. Yeah, that's the name all right. Printing's real clear. We'll return to James Stewart as the six shooter in just a moment. Now, during the holiday season with more cars than usual on the road and adverse weather conditions, think a minute. If a child should dash across an intersection, if a tire should blow out, could you stop in time to save a life? As always during a holiday season, you must be more alert than ever in following simple safety rules. Keep your windshield clear of fog and snow. Be certain your headlights and wipers are working properly. In wet weather, never slam on your brakes. It's a sure way to put your car into a skid. And always follow other cars at a safe distance. Don't be one of those unfortunates who will lose his life in a traffic accident this Yuletide. Be careful, friends. Live to have a safe and happy Christmas. Now, Act Two of the Six Shooter, starring James Stewart as Britt Ponset. The next couple of minutes or two, Arch and Maggie just stood there looking at each other. And the way they were looking at each other, I tell you, it was the same kind of an expression a calf gets just before you hit them with a Brandon on it. Then Arch walked over to the window and raised it up just like he was getting ready to jump out. I thought sure Maggie would stop him, but she didn't. All she did was just grab the calling card out of my hand and start rubbing her finger over the print on it. Arch, it's real engraving. Yeah. Why can't I do it, Maggie? Why can't I end it all right here and now? Oh now, what are you talking about, Arch? What's got into you folks anyhow? P.T. Barnum, Britt. You know who P.T. Barnum is, don't you? Well, he said he was in show business. In show business? He is show business. Jenny Lin, General Tom Thumb, half the stars in America owe their careers to him. Yeah? Don't you see, Britt, he was going to come to the theater tonight. He was going to watch his act without us even asking him. Well, if he liked it, well, there's no telling what would have happened. He might have hired us himself. An actor gets a chance like this only once. It will appear before P.T. Barnum. Arch, Arch, maybe it's not too late. It is too late. No, listen now. Now the company is still in town. All we have to do is unpack the costume. The performance has been canceled, Maggie. Then we'll un-cancel it. I'll round up the rest of the cast, change your train tickets. Sure, that's it. And you, you get over to the opera house. Make sure they haven't let it out to somebody else. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, oh no. No, no, what about an audience? Oh, yeah, something. Well, I tell you, give some of the kids around town passes. They'll spread the word quick enough. Well, now just don't stand there, Arch. Get moving. All right, Maggie. All right. All right. Well, Maggie, I guess I'm going to... Britt, Britt, now you go and find Mr. Barnum. What? He must be staying in the hotel. The clerk will give you the room number. Well, I... Tell him we rearranged our schedule again. We're playing handler tonight. But for heaven's sakes, don't let him know it's because of him. Oh. And tell him, tell him he won't need tickets. We're saving him the front box. Well, hurry up, Britt. Hurry up. Before I make some other plans. All right, sure, sure. All right, Maggie. Come in. Mr. Barnum? Yes. Oh, hello there. Howdy. My name's Britt Ponset. I'm glad to meet you, Mr. Ponset. What can I do for you? Well, my friends, the plunkets, the plunkets, they asked me to find you. Oh. And they've sort of changed their plans. It seems they're going to stay over in Virtue City tonight and give the show. Oh, I see. And they asked me to tell you that they're saving a box for you if you'd care to use it tonight. That's very considerate, Mr. Ponset. I'd be delighted. Are you with the company? How's that? Are you one of the performers? I'm to have the pleasure of watching tonight. Oh, no. No, no. I'm just a friend. Oh. Well, thank you for delivering the message. Don't mention it, Mr. Barnum. Don't mention it. Well, I didn't see any more of Arch and Maggie that afternoon. I figured they'd have plenty to keep them busy. This acting job is about like anything else, I guess. It must be a certain amount of work to them. Anyway, about seven o'clock, I was up in my room putting on a clean shirt, getting fixed up to go to the theater and watch their play. Come in. Hello, Britt. Oh, hello, Arch. Maggie. Well, what's the matter? I'm just born under an unlucky star, I guess. Oh? My fault. I never should have suggested giving a performance tonight in the first place. Oh, Arch, couldn't you get the opera house? No. No, it's available. Well, Mr. Barnum's coming. He told me so himself. Oh, heaven forbid. Well, I thought you were so anxious for him to see us. Not just to see us, but to like us, to appreciate our talent. Oh, if I'd only stopped to thank Arch. Oh, don't blame you, my dear. Blame myself. I should have realized the whole idea of our playing tonight was out of the question. Now I've sent those kids all over town. Well, maybe we can catch an early train, but sneak away before anyone knows. Now, now, hold on there. Now, what are you both so down on the mouth about? Now, you've got the theater, and you're going to have an audience, Mr. Barnum included. Well, that's just it, Britt, the audience. Huh? It'll be the same folks who came last night. Oh, I see. They'd be foolish, make fun of us, probably start shooting again. And what will Mr. Barnum think? We're the worst actors he's ever seen, that's what he'll think. Yeah, but there ought to be some way of maintaining order. What about the sheriff? He is a man to do it. I've already seen him. Yeah? Oh, what'd he say? Said if we ain't any better than we was last night, he's advising the boys and audience not to aim at the ceiling. Is that so? One big opportunity, Britt, and it's ruined before we ever got started. Well, maybe there won't be any trouble. Maybe the audience will like this. What is it, Hamlet? Maybe they'll like that better than the one you gave them before. They won't. It isn't one of our most successful presentations. You couldn't try something else, could you? We only do two plays, Britt. The fellow and Hamlet. I see. Now, I guess it wouldn't be much point repeating that Othello. No, it wouldn't. Uh-huh. Well, I'm awful sorry, Arch. I wish there was something I could do. Do you, Britt? Do you really wish there was something you could do? Why, sure, Maggie. Sure. Well, as a matter of fact, we did have one possible solution. So? It sort of involves you in a way. What, me? You see, you're practically saving our lives, Britt, if you do it. Explain it to him, Arch. Maybe, uh, maybe you'd better do the explaining. No, no, no. It really was your idea, Arch. Go on, Arch. Well, you see, Britt, now, now, don't say no until you hear me out. Well, I'm not saying anything. You see, uh, we were thinking most of the folks here in town must, well, they must know you by sight and they know you're the six shooter. So, it... Well, I said no. You can be darn sure of that. And I kept saying it over and over and over again for the next hour and a half. What they were suggesting was just Tom foolishness. That's all. I just had to turn them down. That's all. Just had to do it. And they must have known I wouldn't agree to a thing like that. But no matter how hard I talked, they just talked harder. And being actors, they had strong voices, too, you know. Well, the next thing I knew, somehow, they'd managed to drag me along with them to the opera house. Anyhow, after the piano solo by Thelma Featherhill, the curtain went up and the show got underway. It started out all right, too. The audience seemed to be paying attention. Nobody was creating any ruckus or anything, at least not at first. Oh, that this too, too solid flesh would melt. That it should come to this but two months dead. Oh, praise to thy name, is woman. Oh, pion. Oh, pion, pion, pion. You're pion, you two. There yet the soul of most unrighteous tears has left for flushing in her garland eyes. She's married. Sounds like old lady Crandall. She only waited two weeks after Jed Crandall kicked the pocket. No, it cannot come to good. But break my heart, for I must hold my tongue. Better get a good grip on it, mister. You see, Brett, you just gotta do it. I can't do it. I can't do it. Oh, look at poor Archie, I tell you. Well, isn't it just enough to break your heart? How weary, stale, flat, and unprofitable seem to me all the uses of this world. Your actin's a little flat too, mister. Go on, Brett, that's your cue. What cue? Go on, I said. Oh, good Horatio, I'm glad to see you well. Hail to your lordship, Brett. Huh? Hail to your lordship. Oh, I, uh, hail to your lordship. What make you from Wittenberg, Horatio? How's that? A truant disposition. Uh, a truant disposition. Can't get to school, kids. Here comes a truant officer. I will not hear your enemy say so. Nor shall you do mine ear that violence. You'll make it faster if your own way ports against you. Oh, he's bringin' out the report card. Now, Sid, Sid, you better take it easy. Don't you see who that is, that other actor fella? What are you talkin' about? It's Brett Ponsett. I know you are. Ponsett, the six shooter? You must be crazy. He's stayin' at the hotel. I seen him this afternoon. Well, what's he doin' up there all next to you? He's a friend of them actors. Oh, if I was you, I'd keep my big mouth shut from here on in. There ain't no sword he's wearin' under that rig. That's a six gun, plain as day. It's followed hard upon. Thrift, thrift Horatio. The funeral baked meats did coldly furnish for the marriage table. Would I had met my dearest, oh, in heaven, there I'd have seen that. Otherwise, you would have known. Oh, woe is me! Now cracks a noble heart. Good night, sweet prince. Sweet, uh... And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest. Uh... Thrift! And flocks of angels sing thee to thy rest. Oh, Brith! Brith, golly, we can't ever thank you enough. Why, if it hadn't been for you, I just don't know what would have ever happened. Oh, golly! And did you see? He stayed through to the end. Mr. Barnum did, right through to the end. Brith, Brith, you were great. Arge, I never felt so foolish in my whole life. Do you think he'll come backstage, Arge? Uh, Mr. Barnum? Somebody help me get out of this thing, will you? Come in. Why, Mr. Barnum, good evening. I just wanted to drop by and tell you how much I enjoyed your performance tonight. We are most honored, sir. Honored. Your future in the theater is assured. And it you there, Pontet. Who, me? You told me you weren't an actor. Oh, he was just sort of filling in, Mr. Barnum. Oh, I realize you weren't up in the part, Mr. Pontet. But such stage presence! Why, the way that audience quieted down when you walked on, I've never seen anything like it before in my life. Never! Now, if you're seriously interested in the theater as a career, I would be very happy. No, no, no, no, no, thanks very much, Mr. Barnum, I'm not interested. No, that's real kind of you, but no, oh, oh, no. Well, sir, I got out of that theater just as fast as my legs could carry me. Gee, I just don't see how anybody can set out to be an actor. All those people staring at you, and that sweat running down the back of your neck, holy smoke. Worse than any gunfighter and so on. Of course, that applause, that's after it was over, that applause, that did sound kind of good. And Mr. Barnum, he was very nice about saying that I had stage presence, whatever that means. I suppose a man could get used to play acting if he had to. Sure is a scary business. Whew! The Sick Shooter is an NBC radio network production in association with Revue Productions. It is based on a character created by Frank Burt, and the transcribed story is written by him. Mr. Stewart may currently be seen in the Universal International Picture, the Glenn Miller story. Others in the cast were Michael Ann Barrett, Tony Barrett, Ted Bliss, Marvin Miller, and Dan O'Hurley. Special music for this program was by Basil Adlam, and the entire production is under the direction of Jack Johnstone. All characters and incidents were fictitious, and any resemblance to actual characters or incidents is purely coincidental. This is Hal Gibney speaking.
