Adventures in time and space transcribed in future tense. The National Broadcasting Company, in cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers of astounding science fiction, bring you Dimension X. In these times, even a child knows the meaning of atomic fission, jet propulsion, and electronic transmission. But we ask ourselves, will the child of the future know? What of the time when science unlocks the secret of life itself? Could it be that one day, such things as constructing human life, or passing back and forth from one dimension to another, will become mere child's play? My name is Sam Weber. I'm an attorney, and a pretty successful one, if I do say so myself. My wife Tina and I live in a comfortable 12-room place up in Westchester. Now, I've read a lot of Horatio Alge stuff in my time, and so have you probably, but I'll bet you've never heard anything quite as spectacular as my story. Maybe you won't believe it, but I used to be a completely different guy. Frightened, sickly, nearsighted, a real Mortimer meek. No kidding. That was five years ago. The big change in me began to take place on a cold December morning in 1945. Just a moment, please. Yes, please. Weber? Yes. Samuel? That's right. Step back. Okay, fellas, bring it in. Oh, just a moment. You must have the wrong address. Watch it, buddy. All right, sign here. Is that for me? Weber apartments. Looks like a coffin. I don't design them, Jack. I just deliver them. Sign here. After much straining, I wasn't in very good physical shape those days. I managed to push the box under my single light bulb. There was a card in a small envelope. Let's see. To Sam from your classmates at the Interdimensional and Cosmic Institute. Merry Christmas. 2145 A.D. Holy jumping catfish. Hey, mister, there must be some mistake. Hey. Holy jumping catfish. They were gone and I didn't even know which delivery company it was. Well, I finally decided to open it up and see what was in it. After about a half hour of fumbling, I gave up. All right, then, don't open. No sooner had I said the word open than it came apart like the skin off a banana. There inside was something resembling a kid's chemical set. Vials, jars, tubes, wires. You never saw so much scientific looking junk in your life. And on top of it all was a book of instructions. Build a man, set number three. This set is intended solely for uses of children between the ages of 11 and 13. The equipment will enable the child to build and assemble complete adult humans in perfect working order. A disassemblator is provided so the set may be used over again. Refills and additional parts may be acquired from the Build a Man Company, 928 Diagonal Level, Glunt City, Ohio. Remember, only with Build a Man can you build a man. When I left for work that morning, my brain was still reeling with the stuff I'd read in the instruction book. Someone's had an OJack at here and he's at law. Just a moment, I will connect you with Mr. OJack. Oh, good morning, Mr. Webber. Good morning, Aunt. I mean, good morning. I've got to get my mind off that book. Only with Build a Man can you build a man. Chapter one, making simple living things. Chapter two, duplicating babies and other small humans. Oh, no. I've got to get a grip on myself. Here, do a little work. Oh, Brian versus O'Brien, Martin versus the City of New York. Oh, it must have been a dream. Probably go home tonight and find the place empty. Well, well, well, if it isn't the poor man's Clarence Darrell. Hello, Lou. I come as a bearer of sad tidings. Well, you don't look very sad. The boss wants to see you, laughing boy. What about? How should I know? And by the way, you'll be very happy to know that I've just been promoted. I'm handling all the criminal stuff from now on. Congratulations. You know what this means for Tina and me, don't you, Junior? Oh, well, cheer up. Tina's not for you anyway. Some got it, some don't. I got it, you don't. So long, laughing boy. That was my good friend, Lou White. In the year I'd known him, he'd already managed to steal the job I wanted. And he was now working on the girl I wanted. Her name was Tina. Tina Velvet. Good morning, Sam. Oh, good morning, Tina. My, you look good enough to... Yeah? Take to lunch. Oh, I'm sorry, Sam, but I promised Lou. Oh, sure. I hope you're not too disappointed. Me? Oh, no, no. Some got it, some don't. I don't. And that was Tina. I tried to steady my blood pressure as I walked into the boss's office. You sent for me, Mr. O'Jack? Oh, yes. Sit down, Webber. Sit down. Oh, thank you, Mr. O'Jack. Webber, I've been reviewing the work of my staff counselors for the past six months. I want to know only one thing. Yes, sir? What happened? I don't understand. You haven't had a single new client in six months. But no one has come in, Mr. O'Jack. My boy, in this business, you've got to be aggressive. You've got to go out and create new clients. You've got to show some zip. Yes, sir. Do you have any zip? Oh, yes, yes, Mr. O'Jack. Oh, I've got zip, all right. I just can't seem to turn it loose. Well, get in there and punch now, Webber. I want to see a change in you in the next few months. As a matter of fact, I'd better. You got that? Yes, Mr. O'Jack. I'll try to show some zip. I left the office early and went home. Sure enough, there it was. My billed man sat, gleaming a little obscenely in the corner. I walked over to it, gave it a kick, and hollered, open sesame. Three minutes later, I was flopped down in bed reading... Chapter One, Making Simple Living Things. An hour later, I was fooling around with such complicated items as the Junior BioCalibrator, which measured everything from blood pressure to hemoglobin content, and the Jiffy Vitalizer, which was actually supposed to put life in your creation, providing you had followed instructions carefully. At eight-thirty, I made my first simple living thing. Here, boy. Here, boy. Oh, maybe you aren't a boy. Oh, let's see. According to the book, you are a rubicular oyster hog. Not much to look at, but I made you. Me, Sam Webber, attorney at law. I have created life. Hey, come back here. Come back here, boy. Here, boy. Hey, hey, hey. It was no use. My rubicular oyster hog, which was a cross between a field mouse and an oyster, had run out under the door and into the world. I was about to take off after it when there was a knock on my door. It was Mrs. Lepante, my landlady. Oh, hello, Mrs. Lepante. I heard a noise. Oh, just rehearsing a speech I have to make in court. You were squeaking. A bad throat. Oh. Oh, by the way, there was a gentleman looking for you this afternoon. A gentleman? Yeah, a tall old man in a black overcoat. Kind of nasty. When I told him, he wasn't any one to go up to your room. I'll tell you why I showed him the way out in a hurry. Oh, thanks, Mrs. Lepante. Probably a bill collector. Yeah. Well, I've got to run. Oh, good morning, Sam. Here's that memo on Rosenthal versus Rosenthal and also a letter for you. What's the matter? You look tired. Oh, I had a bad night. Your lumbego again? Uh, yes, yes. Oh. Oh, say, by the way, your client was here again this morning. A client? Yeah. Oh, it must be the same fellow that called at my house the other day. Well, what did you tell him? Oh, I said you'd be in later. Oh, thanks. Um, will that be all, Sam? Yes. Oh, no, no. Uh, are you doing anything New Year's Eve? Oh, Sam, you haven't even noticed. Noticed what? The ring, silly, third finger left hand. What? Lou gave it to me. Isn't it simply gigantic? But you, you're not going to... We're going to be married as soon as Lou finishes his next case. Lou is so sharp and businesslike. So is a guillotine. Sam, after Lou gave me the ring last night, I began thinking how, well, how I used to hope that it would be you. But, well, then I realized you'd never have the money and, well, a girl has to think of things like a good steady income and a husband with... Zip. Yes, with a zip. Well, Lou has plenty of zip. I'm sure you'll be very happy zipping around with each other. Oh, Sam. Well, Sam, I... Hey. Hey, what's going on in here? Honey, is this little baboon giving you any trouble? If he has, I'll take him apart like an egg crate. No, no, no, take it easy, strong heart. Tina just told me the good news about your engagement. She's crying with happiness. Is that right, honey? Well, then no hard feelings, Sam. Just that the best man got the girl, you understand. Oh, say, by the way, we're having a little celebration at Seagalley's tonight. Drop in and we'll live it up a little, huh? I went home feeling like a man who has been stuffed into a washing machine with a dial-sided rinse dry. I was a failure. I walked over to the mirror for a heart-to-heart talk with myself. Nothing. That's what you've got, Sam Weber, in unlimited quantities. Nothing. We ought to just tear you down and start all over again. We ought to take you... Hey. Oh, no, no, not that again. But why not? Think of it. A Sam Weber without the psychological problems you've got. A dynamic, uninhibited Sam who could win a girl like Tina by sheer magnetism. Then when it was all over, we could just take the old disassemblator and presto. And I can do it too. Chromosome content, check. Cerebral content. Maybe a little more in, a little less superego. Limbs, eyes, hair, general endocrine reaction. Well, here goes. It's moving. Holy mackerel, it's alive. It's getting up. Say, I feel great. Take it easy. Do you know who you are? Of course I do. I have all the thoughts you ever had up until the point I was vitalized. My brain is an exact duplicate of yours, except that I'm not all blocked up psychologically. It said in the instruction manual you'd be uninhibited. Say, this is all right. Oh, by the way, since we both have the same name, it'll simplify things if I call you Weber. I'll be Sam. Oh, now look here. I'll make the decision. How would you like a good punch in the nose? Is that any way to talk to your own parent? I did create you, you know. I don't think I don't appreciate it, Weber, old man, but let's get one thing straight. I live my life and you live yours. You got that? Who pays the rent? You do, for a while, anyway. I haven't decided whether or not I want to stay in the law business. The law business? I may want her spread out a little. Tina is the kind of girl to whom money is very important. Tina? Well, what did you expect? I have enough of your likes and dislikes to want her just as badly as you do. The only difference being that I can get her. No, we're not quite the same, you and I. I've got zip. Don't use that word. Now, how about some dinner? You know, I'm starved. I'm gonna have to go out. I'll need some clothes. Sorry, I only have this one suit. Fine, you can lend it to me. Oh, what about me? I'll bring you a sandwich after I come back from Sagalli's. Sagalli's? Well, you haven't forgotten, have you, Weber? We're invited to the celebration, Tina and Lou White. Only it wouldn't look quite right if we both showed up, so I'll tell you all about it. Now, off with that suit and no nonsense. Well, this is living it up, folks. Have another drink, Mr. O'Jack. Thank you, Lou. Well, is everybody happy? Hey, honey, are you having yourself a little old time? Oh, yes, Lou, fine, fine. But you seem to be preoccupied. Oh, I was just wondering if Sam is coming. Sam? Oh, no. Did you hear that, Mr. O'Jack? She's worrying about Sam. Why, that little runt probably got frightened by a noise maker. Well, well, well, the happy couple. Sam! Good evening, cats. Everybody's lit up like a Christmas tree. Well, I'll be... Say, Sam, are you in the bag? Never touch the stuff, Luma Boy. Never touch it, Boy Scout Training. Oh, Sam, I was afraid you weren't coming. Miss a chance to be with you beautiful... never. Hey, what's got into you, Webber, Monkey Glens? I don't read you, muscle-bound. Well, you seem different somehow, even your voice. Do you notice anything, Tina? Well, yes, it does seem richer somehow. Oh, nonsense. Sam Webber, you're nothing but a clean puff and you always will be. Mr. O'Jack, I think he owes me an apology for that. I should think so. All right, all-American boy, make with the apology. Apologize me? Oh, no. Why, for two cents. Folks, would you excuse Mr. White and me for a few minutes? We want to step out into the hall for a little private conference. Coming, Mr. White? I'll be right back, honey. Don't worry about a thing. Okay, big boy, you've taken enough punishment. Now. Sam, Lou, Lou, don't kill him. He did... Oh, dear. He'll be all right in a little while, baby. But did you? I mean... Oh, Sam. Tina. We really shouldn't kiss like this. It's what you've always wanted, isn't it? Well, isn't it? Oh, Sam. By this time, he's probably kissing her. And there's nothing you can do about it, Webber, old man. Nothing. Hey, wait a minute. Where's that book of instructions? To disassemble a build-a-man model, merely focus the ray of the disassemblator device and press lever X. But that's murder, counselor. Still, legally, in order to prove there's been a murder, you need a corpus delecti. And nobody even knows there is another Sam, Webber. So you're finally home. I'm starved. Sorry, Webber, old man, but very pressing business detained me. I suppose you made a fool of me over at Seagalley's. Oh, on the contrary. What do you mean? My boy, you are looking at a man who in one fell swoop has got himself a raise, a promotion, and a wife. At least she'll be my wife tomorrow. Who? Tina, of course. I don't believe her. I had to put on quite a show, but all around it was a real success. Mr. O'Jack was so impressed he called me aside and said he was going to give me a crack at some criminal cases. And if I made the grade, why, who knows, I may even accept a partnership. You've got it all figured out, haven't you? That's about it. Only you neglected to consider one thing. Oh, what's that? This. Hey, put that down. Get back, you. You, you surfer, you. I'm going to melt you down like a Welsh rarebred. Webber, you can't do that. It's murdery. It's like killing your own son. After what you've done to me, it's a pleasure. I didn't ask to be brought into this world, but now that I'm here, I like it enough to want to survive. Take off my suit, you foley. You won't be needing it again. You're really going through with it, huh? I am. All right. Oh, here's your jacket. Oh, my arm. Give me that thing. Give it to me. That's better. Now we'll fix this little item so it can't do any damage. Oh, no. You see, Webber, you don't have the guts to stand up against the man you might have been. Oh, what's that sound? I don't know. It seems to be inside the house. Somebody's coming up the stairs. Listen. Take a peek through the keyhole, Webber. Oh, we can jump. It's him. The old man with the black coat. His eyes all black and shiny without any whites. Looks insane. Don't open it. Ooh. He's burning it. He's burning a hole right through the door. Good evening, gentlemen. As I feared, I'm too late to prevent you from duplication, Mr. Webber. And I see that you have destroyed the disassemblator. That means I shall have to do the job manually. An ugly task. Who are you? I am the census keeper for the 24th oblong. You see, your Build-A-Man set was intended for one of the Webber children who is on a field trip in this oblong 200 years from now. Because of an unfortunate time warp, the set was delivered here accidentally. You mean this set came here from 200 years from now? Precisely. Time, as with all things, is relative. We shall have to recover the set, of course, and adjust any discrepancies it has caused. Meanwhile, the problem is, which of you two gentlemen is the original Sam Webber? Oh, I am. Miss Lier! Difficulties, difficulties. Why cannot I ever have a simple case like a double conuplication? Now look here, Mr. Census Keeper. The duplicate will obviously be less stable and more emotionally unbalanced. Certainly a man of your qualifications can decide which of us is the more valid member of society. Which of us will conform more readily to the standards of... Naturally. I observe that one of you is naked. Oh, wait a minute. And you also seem to be trembling. Whereas this gentleman seems quite calm. No, no, no, hold it. You're making a mistake. I hardly think so. No, no, stay away from me. Please do not strut. Help, please, please. Mr. Webber. Yes. It would be better if you didn't watch. Of course. Well, that's my story. Within ten seconds, the old Sam Webber had been completely dismantled and packed into the box. Tina and I were married and I went on to become a full partner in the firm of O'Jack, Somerset, and Webber. Oh, and by the way, Tina and I have been doing quite successfully what the old Sam Webber and his build-a-man set made such a mess of. We have one, two, three little conuplications. Sam Jr., age four, Sametta, age three, and Samina, age four months. Good night. You have just heard another adventure into the unknown world of the future. The world of... The mansion. Time is a strange and mysterious dimension. Could we alter the future if we could travel back in time to our own youth? Next week we bring you a story of a man who found the answer in Time and Time Again. Time and Time Again. Dimension X is presented transcribed each week by the National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Street and Smith, publishers of the magazine Astounding Science Fiction. Today Dimension X has presented Child's Play, written for radio by George Lefferts from the story by William Ten. Featured in the cast were Leon Jani as Sam, Carl Webber as his alter ego, and Patsy Campbell as his girl. Your host was Norman Rose, music by Burt Berman. Dimension X is produced by William Welch and directed by Fred Way. In reply to many queries from our listeners, last week's story on Dimension X, Pebble in the Sky, was written by Isaac Asimov. This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.
